My mirror is broken
14 02 2008This post is mainly about self reflection. I still look in the mirror and see the 5′ 3″ 225 lb woman standing there. Even 60 pounds later. It goes beyond the mirror though. For example:
The other day I was at the mall. I stopped infront of a cute clothing store and saw the recent addition of a plus size section. Inwardly I was excited! I said to myself WOW I can shop here now! I was looking at a size 20 thinking that would be cute! I told my husband I was going to go try it on and he said… “Sure, If you can find it in your new size.”
I had to stop and say oh yeah I dont wear a 20 anymore. I wear a 12. And I can shop here without the plus section.
What do you have to do to change the way you look at the world? Not only food, but people, and clothes, and activity. If someone suggests a sport I always think… Oh I cant do that there is probably a weight restriction.
Or I see a blog or WW post and see someones stats and see 170lbs or 165 lbs and I’m like oh look at them they are almost there! I get excited for them but keep that mindset like I have so far to go still.
My scale today said 163.6. 62.2 lbs less than when i started. Almost to my goal of 140-145. When will my mind catch up with my body? SHould I go see someone or will it just take time? Does anyone else have this problem or am I on my own little island?
Hey ~ thanks for dropping by! You have made some amazing progress with your weight loss - its very inspiring.
I think you raise an interesting point about self perception - I know what you are saying. I have always felt big. I was always taller and bigger boned than the girls in my class (ever hugged a friend and felt like you were going to squish them at the same time you can feel them struggling to reach around!!?)
Years of seeing yourself that way can distort your reality. I look at pictures of myself from 5 years ago when I weighed about 143 pounds, but I still felt big. A stone heavier these days and I am cursing myself for not enjoying my figure when I had it. For not even realising it was there.
I think part of the battle is believing you deserve to look good - when we struggle with food and we feel out of control it is easy to punish ourselves for that lack of control and to feel unworthy.
But we are worth it!! Every day should be a L’oreal day!! Next time you’re looking in the mirror make like Jennifer Aniston and say “Because I’m worth it!!”