Taking the Reins

Yes, I am still around.  It’s been months, I know, but to be honest, I’ve been a little distracted.

On Saturday, I will attempt my first Olympic distance triathlon.  A year ago when I started this triathlon thing, I thought it would be a great way to get into shape and challenge myself.  I raced sprints, which are short, 1.5 hour events that require you to do a little bit of everything.  NEVER, in my wildest imagination, would I think myself capable of stepping up to Olympic, and swimming 1 mile, biking 26 miles, and running 6.2 miles.  Never!!  In fact, even though I have consistently put 2 of the 3 together in practice at that distance, I still am wondering if this is something I am capable of doing.  Darn self doubt.

The past few months have included a lot of firsts for me.  My first 3 hour bike ride.  My first 7 mile run.  My first 2 mile swim.  Each first seemed sweeter than the last, and left me feeling like I’d conquered the world, no matter how slow I actually was.  And I have to admit, I’ve been eating things I ordinarily wouldn’t dream of eating.  So even though I burn 2500 calories on a Saturday morning, I eat 1/4 of them during my ride and then probably compensate by going out to eat and demolishing everything in site.  No major weight gain, but clearly, NOT on program.

So after Saturday, I will be back on weight loss mode.  Because lighter means faster, and I have a uniform to squeeze into for the rest of the summer!

But yes, I am alive…..if anyone remembers me.

I have to admit, I have not behaved very well this week.  In fact, after burning 3000 calories in less than 4 days, I decided that I’d partake in the hamburger and french fries meal at Disneyland yesterday for lunch.  (Salt….craving salt…..wonder why?!)

So today, I was an angel.  Oatmeal for breakfast.  Apple and banana for snack.  Measured my almonds.  Ordered a chef salad (the equivalent of 1 slice of cheese and a few slices of deli meat) and had oil & vinegar that *I* put on it for lunch.  Oh, boy, was I good.  And to top off my excellent day, I did my first 2000 meter swim set.  I’ve swum a mile before, but I’ve never gone over a mile, and certainly not after sprinting the majority of my swim time.  I was pretty darn proud of myself, I must say!

Tomorrow, hubby wants to hit the mountain bike trails and do a nice ride in the morning.  Then he wants to take photos on the beach at sunset while I get in my 4-mile aerobic run.  Sunday, I have practice, where we have a 90-minute bike ride on tap followed by a leisurely 30-minute run. 

While I may be feeling slightly guilty about my Disneyland indulgence, I’d like to think the weekend will take care of it all.  I hope.

Anyway, there’s my update.  Race day is now 9 weeks away.  Yikes!!!  I have 9 weeks to add 6 miles to my biking and 1 mile to my run.  And then to string them all together effortlessly.  I hope I can get there.

http://billstatus.ls.state.ms.us/2008/pdf/history/HB/HB0282.xml

Mississippi should be ashamed of this bill.  I thought it was a joke when I was directed to the site, but I really think it might actually be legitimate.  Some idiotic lawmaker thinks that it should be against the law to serve obese people food in restaurants.  Can you believe that?  And the kicker is that BMI is used to determine obesity, and we all know what a crock of you-know-what that can be!  I am beyond annoyed by this.  One of my favorite triathlon bloggers — an Ironman triathlete — is technically obese and linked to this article.  It’s so absurd I don’t think I have any other comments.

Down 1 lb today!  Now, back in the day, 1 lb was definitely a bummer for me, but at this time in my life, I’m psyched.  That’s a 2-week trend there, and proof to myself that I can get there.  I’ve been traveling quite a bit on top of my training, so I’m happy that all the French restaurants and strange dining times haven’t taken their toll. 

Anyway, I’m still alive.  I’m still on program.  I’m just lacking in the time department and haven’t had anything too thought-provoking to blog about.  Maybe tomorrow?

Since when did wraps become worse than the sub???  OMG, I am about ready to scream!  I didn’t want to waste too many points today, so I decided on the wrap instead of the regular sub.  Now, I haven’t ordered the wrap in several years, but I seem to recall it being low in points.  Well, the wrap looked suspiciously like a flour tortilla, but I decided that maybe after all these years, they’ve come up with something a little better.

MY DARN WRAP WAS 390 CALORIES!!!!!

I’m feeling like crying right now.  Here I am, still hungry, and out of points for the rest of the day.  My knees hurt, but now I HAVE to go out on my run because I’ve used my flex points up on Thursday and Friday.

Good grief.  I could smack them for switching the wraps.  Bite me, Subway.  You stink!

Ah, day 5 of “back in the saddle.”  In that time, I have ran 10 miles, biked 40, swam 1, hiked 4…….well, suffice it to say I’ve been a busy girl. 

Ordinarily, by day 5, I’d see some favorable movement on the scale.  Unfortunately, this has not been the case so far.  In fact, I’ve even gained!!!!  I’m technically “on program.”  22 points a day, have had 8 of my 35 flex points, and I’ve only eaten 1/2 of the points that I “earn.”  Yet I have gained.

What cruel, cruel power is making me so fat?  I’m working my tail off.  I’m denying myself the food and quanitities that I want.  And for once, I’m not lying about it, either.  I’m straight up serious….have recorded every last bite for the past 5 days…..and have gained.

Am wondering if maybe it’s my activity points?  In order to lose weight, I have to be in caloric deficit.  So if I run 4 miles and burn 440 calories (according to my Garmin, which records my heart rate and knows my height, weight, and age), that is the equivalent of 4 activity points.   I only eat 2 of those…..I eat them, because I am starving if I don’t eat them.  (And I do have to eat a recovery food after a 40-minute workout, and this isn’t planned in my day)  If I do a 1/2 hour, mile swim workout in the pool and burn 380 calories, I call it 3 points and eat 1.

What gives?

I just don’t even know what to do right now.  Two years ago, it all worked for me.  I don’t know what makes it all different now?

Sorry for the vent….helps to write it out.

I’ve had this post semi-composed in my arsenal for quite some time now, and after my first WW meeting this week after a long hiatus, I thought I’d share it.

I finally caught up on my DVR recordings this past week, and one of the episodes I watched was of last season’s Biggest Loser.   One of the contenstants said something that really got me ticked off, so I thought I’d come over here and chat about it.

So, The Biggest Loser.  Ah, I love this show.  It’s been inspirational for me in my time of need, and it’s inspiring thousands of others to change their lives as well.  But one of the contestants said something in an interview about the twin that lost over 100 lbs that really irked me.  She said, “it’s not fair that he wins all the challenges.  I don’t even know why he’s still here.  He’s thin now!” 

When you are “thin” by everyone else’s standards but still technically not in a healthy BMI range, do you get thrown out of the fat club?  Does the fact that you may not show outward fat mean that you are not fat anymore and therefore do not deserve the support and attention that others who happen to weigh more than you receive?  Is it assumed that once someone reaches a reasonable weight that makes them appear more “thin” to the outside world, that they are somehow “cured” of what got them to be overweight in the first place?

Well, it’s crap.  I was really offended by her comment on the show, because that guy was heavier than she was when he got there!  And he’s still the same person who joined the show at 300+ lbs…..he was just a really hard worker and was blessed with a body that willingly sheds pounds.  But that doesn’t mean he doesn’t deserve to be there anymore to continue to work towards a goal.

 I guess I see this in weight loss communities everywhere, particularly at Weight Watchers.  Meetings are geared towards changing your lives and eating right…..getting to your goal.  What happens when you hit Lifetime?  Nothing.  You get a keychain, you have to weigh in once a month, and suddenly nobody wants to hear from you.  There’s no more “yeah for Suzie, she lost 2 lbs this week!”  The strangers who join are not interested in listening to you talk about your struggles— they see that you look “normal” and don’t believe that you ever had “struggles.”  And the content of the meetings themselves just aren’t geared toward a “maintainer” lifestyle, so you are there, all by yourself, on a mission that nobody but a few and your leader understand.

People, I don’t think there’s a CURE!  So here’s my personal plea.  Do not kick me out of the fat club.  DO NOT.  Because I’m going to struggle with this my entire life, no matter how I look now, and I need just as much support as somebody who is 50-100 lbs. overweight.  Because all it takes is my support to go away and I can be back there faster than the blink of an eye.  Such a tenuous balance, this healthy lifestyle is in this day and age.

So the next time you see the Lifetime at WW talk about how the scale went up last week and they are freaking out, please, please don’t roll your eyes.  It might be you in 6 months.

Yes, I finally returned to Weight Watchers after a yearlong absence. 

I can’t explain what started this random act, except that I’m sick of seeing myself inch farther and farther away from goal despite my gains in fitness.  I know what I need to do…..but I need the meetings to help me do it.

My new leader is adorable.  An older lady, with plenty of other older ladies sitting in the front row laughing away at all the jokes.  I thought it was hilarious.  But better yet, I had to weigh in, I faced up to the truth, and now I know what has to be done to get me there.

We don’t lose weight in triathlon training because the training program is aimed at improved performance.  When one is in caloric deficit, which is what is required for weight loss, the body is lethargic and does not “perform” to the best of its ability.  While the next few weeks are base-building, I CAN be slow and lethargic, so I need to take advantage of it and really hit the program as hard as I can.  It has to be a simple matter of calories in = calories out.  I can crack this code.

So that’s my news.  I’m back.  153.6.  Next week, I’ll be back down close to goal and won’t have to pay WW another dime.

I’m happy to report that the initial shock and awe of my excess eating due to the Abs Diet has now subsided.  I’ve got a grasp on it, and I’ve modified the plan so that I’m staying within my WW points now.  As a result, I lost the 1.5 lb gain, and lost another 0.5 lbs.  I even completed my 3rd weight circuit last night and managed to get to spin class on Thursday!  How’s THAT for dedication?  Hey, baby steps here.

 My triathlon training program starts up again next week.  We get schedules e-mailed to us for our individual workouts, but with the group, we are doing “Power Yoga” and a timed run for next week.  I’m psyched!  I cannot wait to get back into it, and I’m looking forward to seeing everyone again and meeting new people.  We are getting together tomorrow to do a run clinic and buy new shoes, and a part of me really wants to get down there and buy a pair….it’s just not in the budget quite yet.  At any rate, suffice it to say I am motivated and ready to get moving!  The gym isn’t so bad when you have a goal like a race to look forward to.

 On another positive note, my parents are planning on flying out to Las Vegas for my first Olympic distance triathlon in April!  I told them not to expect greatness because it’s an early season race and my first time pushing myself, but it’ll be so much fun and so motivating to have them there cheering me on. 

 Anyway, that’s my update.  Have a great weekend.

Well, the sheer panic has set in. Abs Diet day 4 reveals a 1.5 lb weight gain. I’m not sure what is happening here, but I’m going to look at what I had yesterday to see if I can identify the culprit:

Meal 1 at 9:00 am: Honey Shake - 1/2 cup skim milk, 1/2 cup Lite & Fit vanilla yogurt, 1 scoop vanilla protein power, 1 tablespooon honey, a tablespoon flax seed (Just eyeballing this, I’d say 3 points, but it could be 4.)

Meal 2 at 11:00am: 15 almonds, 1 skim milk string cheese, 1 Fiberful bar (200 calories, 4 points)

Meal 3 at 1:30pm: Chicken breast with corn, black beans, and tomatoes, covered in tabasco and 1/2 serving of low fat shredded cheese (estimate 6 points)

Meal 4 at 3:30pm: Power Shake - 1/2 cup skim milk, 1/2 cup Lite & Fit yogurt, 1 scoop chocolate whey protein, 1 tablespoon natural PB, 1/3 cup ground oatmeal (looks to be at least 6 pts)

Meal 5 at 6:30pm: Egg Sandwich: 1 Thomas’ Lite English muffin, spray butter, 2 eggs, 2 slices fat free cheese (7 points)

Meal 6 at 8:30pm: 2/3 cup of shelled pistachios (holy cow, these are 310 calories and 24 grams of fat…..pistachios are EVIL!!!!….estimate 7 points)

Activity: 30 minute weight lifting circuit — maybe 2 points?

So, 1.5 lb weight gain = salt, not enough water, and 34 WHOPPING POINTS.   I had no idea!!! I just really need to go back to what has worked…..WW…..and try to incorporate SOME of what the Abs Diet preaches into it.

So, here is what today is shaping up to be like:

Meal 1 at 9am: Coffee with creamer and 1 Fiberful bar (3 points) — Powerfood is dairy and fiber

Meal 2 at 11am: 1 cup Dannon Light & fit yogurt with 1/2 oz. walnuts and strawberries (4 points) — powerfood is dairy, nuts, and berries

 Meal 3 at 1:00pm: Chef salad with spinach, chickpeas, green peppers, hard boiled egg, in vinegar and oil — (6 points) — powerfoods are spinach, eggs, EVOO

Meal 4 at 4:00pm: 7 almonds and string cheese (2 points) - powerfood dairy and almonds

Meal 5 at 7:00pm: Protein Shake with 1 cup of Almond Breeze, scoop of chocolate whey protein, 1 tbsp peanut butter, and ground flax seed (5 pts) - powerfood peanut butter, whey protein, and flax

Meal 6 at 9:00pm: Organic oatmeal square bar (2 points) - powerfood: oatmeal

Total points: 22

Activity points: 6 (spin class)

 I’m just now realizing that nuts, although good for you, cannot be eaten by the handful. They are just loaded with fat and calories. The Abs Diet was written by a man, but I don’t know how women can eat 1800 calories a day unless they are burning big-time calories. Hopefully that’ll be me next week, but we shall see… At any rate, thanks for letting me vent and work out my issues. Helps to write!

Long time no write.  I’ve been on vacation….from everything, it seems.  The holiday toll?  I’m now up to 155, the highest I’ve been since I lost all my weight years ago and over 4 lbs above my goal weight.  I’m scared, but instead of getting mad, I’m getting even.

 Christmas resulted in a lovely book called the “Abs Diet for Women.”  Now, don’t go laughing quite yet.  Some of what he has to say is dead on, and I agree with it.  His use of low fat ice cream in all the smoothies isn’t his most brilliant work, nor are his crappy recipes, but for a beginner strength routine and introduction to such powerfood as berries, almonds, spinach, and oatmeal — fantastic.

So I’m overlapping the Abs Diet with WW and will see where that takes me.  Everything containing high fructose corn syrup in the house has been thrown out.  There are no more refined anything in the cupboard…..if it’s high on the ingredient list, it’s in the trash.  I’ve bought huge bags of almonds and walnuts, ground flax seed, a high quality whey protein powder, and bags of chicken breasts and frozen spinach.  As drastic as it sounds, this wasn’t too far off from the way I was.  I’m just eliminating a few ex-staples of my diet (the bars and 100-calorie packs), and substituting them with organic peanut butter and celery, or organic yogurt with nuts and berries.  I was sad to see my beloved Yoplait Light had high fructose corn syrup as the 2nd ingredient……I threw them all out and now I’m a Greek yogurt person!

Yesterday was Day 1, as I just couldn’t wait.  We did a 4-mile hike with a nice elevation gain to start the afternoon, and I finished the evening with a 30-minute ab/core/back strength routine, all from the privacy of my own home.  My triathlon training program starts next week, so that should give me all the cardio I need to complement the new weight training program the Abs Diet has put me on.  (For as disorganized and cheesy the book is, they do a very nice job of showing you all the different exercises you can do with a mat, a swiss ball, and free weights)  This week I need to get back into the pool so that my body isn’t too shocked when we have our first swim practice.  I also need to hit a spin class or two, just to get those legs back into shape.  I want to run, but I think my knees need a another week or so of conditioning before I am ready to test them out again.

So, how’s that for change?  We’ll see how it goes, but I figured I had to jump-start my weight loss somehow, and doing something drastic is always helpful.  Abs Diet for Women is basically like Core with weight training, so maybe I’ll hit up a few meetings and see if it makes sense to just call my eating “Core.”  Until then, I’m a smoothie-making, nut-eating, weight lifting machine!  (With lots of cardio in between, because I love love love it!)

Well, I just can’t stop smiling right now.  The non-runner…..the girl who could barely manage to do the mile run in PE in under 15 minutes….the girl who five months ago could not run a mile without walking……

 Got 2nd place!!!

Oh yes, this was momentous indeed.  So, the fast runners in my age group didn’t come out to play today, but there were 15 or so of us, and I was #2.  I hit the podium in my very first running race, and I can’t stop smiling!  There were over 1000 of us towing the start this morning, and it took about a minute and a half to clear the start chute and get running.  I felt like I was out in the water at a triathlon, battling for space…..I had no idea that runners experience the same thing.  In order to make up for the non-movement at the start of the race, I knew I’d have to pick up my pace for the first mile, then settle into my 9-minute miles for the rest of the race.  I was surprised at how well things went for me.  In triathlons, the 5K is a nightmare and I am tired and hating life.  Today, I was invigorated running in the crowd and enjoying dashing around people in their costumes.  The last mile was a bit tough, but I kept up  my pace and finished strong.  It was the first time my husband has been at the finish line waiting for me, so that was excellent motivation to not slow down and disappoint him.  But what fun!  And then finding out that I’d placed was pretty sweet, too.  My official time was 28:03 (I said that the fast people didn’t show up in my age group!), but if I back out the start, I probably did a 26:30 5K.  THAT makes me exceedingly happy. 

Now I have a taste for it…..and I’d better get close to the podium in triathlon now, because that’s what really gets my juices flowing.  I just need to buy more frozen peas….my poor knees are hating me right about now!

Here’s a pic from the race….I dressed up a little, but I still look like I’m hating life!:

I’ve been absent since I got back from Thanksgiving.  It’s not because I couldn’t post.  It’s because I’ve been hiding things.  Yes, I have been bad.  And because I use this blog to talk about my eating habits, I shall now outline all of the horrible things I’ve done over the past few weeks.

1.  I ate two bagels for lunch yesterday.  (I can explain this— have been working 12+ hour days and was unable to leave work, but because I have no food in the house, I couldn’t pack a lunch — so I was at the mercy of what was leftover from meetings that morning and I was REALLY hungry)

2.  I have Reduced Fat Jif in the cupboard.  I know I can’t resist the stuff.  In fact, I must have at least a tablespoon a day.  I know for a fact that even that small amount adds pounds to my rear end.  But do I stop?  No.

3.  I have had little to no extra time for exercise.  I sometimes get in to work at 6am.  I’m there until 7pm.  There is nothing left in the tank for the gym, considering what I’d want to do is swim or take a spin class. 

4.  When faced with chocolate cheesecake, I demolished the entire chocolate topping.  (I left the cheesecake, though– mustn’t that count for something?)

5.  I ate Chick Fil A french fries with DH.  He is an enabler.

6.  I’m back to binge eating my favorite cereal, Honey Bunches of Oats.  (Although I’ll do it to pretty much anything, save for All Bran, which is a little too gritty for that)

7.  AH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OK, all better now.  Clean slate.  How many slates must I wipe clear before I finally get a handle on this?! 

I need to find a balance with work.  Go to my 1st yoga class.  (Except I’m too nervous because I don’t even know what to wear or do)  Do something to channel all this extra angst that is showing up in my eating habits.

I shall contemplate and try to find a better way.

I made these tonight from a recipe in Her Sports Magazine….but after reading the fine print, it looks like the original author is the American Institute for Cancer Research’s “Marlene Koch’s 375 Sensational Splenda Recipes.”

 Now, I was skeptical about the black beans, and because of that, I used regular butter, regular eggs, and regular sugar.  But now that I’ve tried the recipe and think it’s fabulous, I wouldn’t hesitate to try spray butter, Egg Beaters, or Splenda.

Ingredients:

3/4  cup black beans, drained

3 tbsp butter, melted

2 large eggs

1 tsp vanilla extract

1/2 cup Splenda or sugar

6 tbsp Dutch-process cocoa powder

1/4 cup all purpose flour

1/4 teaspoon baking powder

1/4 cup chopped walnuts, optional

Prehead oven to 325 F.  Spray 8 x 8 pan with nonstick spray.  In a small bowl, combine cocoa powder, flour, and baking powder, then set aside.  Place beans and melted butter in a food processor and puree until beans are completely smooth, like a thick paste.  Scrape bean mixture into a medium-size bowl.  With a wooden spoon, beat in eggs, vanilla, and sugar, until mixed well.  Add cocoa mixture and stir.  Mix in nuts.  Spoon batter into prepared pan.  Baked for 13 - 15 minutes or until center springs back when touched.  Do not over bake.  Cool in pan on wire rack.  Makes 12 servings.

Nutrition per serving:

100 calories (132 if using sugar), 4 grams total fat (2 saturated), 14 grams carbohydrates (22 with sugar), 2 grams fiber, 3 grams protein, 95 mg sodium.

A+ to this recipe!  Hubby didn’t like it because it wasn’t Ghiradelli, but I’m in love.  Who knew black beans and chocolate could taste so good?!

Oh, if only it were as good as the past 2 years.

 Not only did I have to travel home for Thanksgiving, but I also had to organize my hubby’s 30th birthday party the night before the big feast.  To say that I overindulged would be an understatement.  Ugh!  But I’m not looking back.  I figure the fever and nausea I had yesterday were enough punishment for my week of bad eating and less-than-stellar exercise.  (I ran about 3.5 miles on Monday, but the altitude got to me and I couldn’t go much farther!)  I didn’t get to run in the Turkey Trot this morning, either— yesterday really took it out of me and I didn’t think I’d be in any shape to try 6.2 miles for the first time ever.

So today, my first day feeling healthy, I’m back on track.  And I’m cooking!!  I decided to make the black bean chocolate brownies that I read about in Her Sports magazine a few months back.  I had bought all the ingredients, but I haven’t been bored enough on a weekend to want to cook since before triathlon season.  Funny how that goes.  Now I know why women cook a lot on Sundays….need something to do while we mourn the loss of our hubbies to football! 

So, this week I have plans to hit the run club.  It’s really only for gym members, but they meet outside and my coach is the sweep, so she thinks it’s fine for me to show up and run with them. I guess until they get wise, I’ll take advantage of the group running benefits and try to stay healthy!  Also need to get my rear in the pool…..I miss it!

At any rate, that’s my update.  Ate a lot for Thanksgiving.  Felt like garbage.  Back on program.  And tomorrow is another day.