Do you get thrown out of the club?
12 01 2008I’ve had this post semi-composed in my arsenal for quite some time now, and after my first WW meeting this week after a long hiatus, I thought I’d share it.
I finally caught up on my DVR recordings this past week, and one of the episodes I watched was of last season’s Biggest Loser. One of the contenstants said something that really got me ticked off, so I thought I’d come over here and chat about it.
So, The Biggest Loser. Ah, I love this show. It’s been inspirational for me in my time of need, and it’s inspiring thousands of others to change their lives as well. But one of the contestants said something in an interview about the twin that lost over 100 lbs that really irked me. She said, “it’s not fair that he wins all the challenges. I don’t even know why he’s still here. He’s thin now!”
When you are “thin” by everyone else’s standards but still technically not in a healthy BMI range, do you get thrown out of the fat club? Does the fact that you may not show outward fat mean that you are not fat anymore and therefore do not deserve the support and attention that others who happen to weigh more than you receive? Is it assumed that once someone reaches a reasonable weight that makes them appear more “thin” to the outside world, that they are somehow “cured” of what got them to be overweight in the first place?
Well, it’s crap. I was really offended by her comment on the show, because that guy was heavier than she was when he got there! And he’s still the same person who joined the show at 300+ lbs…..he was just a really hard worker and was blessed with a body that willingly sheds pounds. But that doesn’t mean he doesn’t deserve to be there anymore to continue to work towards a goal.
I guess I see this in weight loss communities everywhere, particularly at Weight Watchers. Meetings are geared towards changing your lives and eating right…..getting to your goal. What happens when you hit Lifetime? Nothing. You get a keychain, you have to weigh in once a month, and suddenly nobody wants to hear from you. There’s no more “yeah for Suzie, she lost 2 lbs this week!” The strangers who join are not interested in listening to you talk about your struggles— they see that you look “normal” and don’t believe that you ever had “struggles.” And the content of the meetings themselves just aren’t geared toward a “maintainer” lifestyle, so you are there, all by yourself, on a mission that nobody but a few and your leader understand.
People, I don’t think there’s a CURE! So here’s my personal plea. Do not kick me out of the fat club. DO NOT. Because I’m going to struggle with this my entire life, no matter how I look now, and I need just as much support as somebody who is 50-100 lbs. overweight. Because all it takes is my support to go away and I can be back there faster than the blink of an eye. Such a tenuous balance, this healthy lifestyle is in this day and age.
So the next time you see the Lifetime at WW talk about how the scale went up last week and they are freaking out, please, please don’t roll your eyes. It might be you in 6 months.
I just started watching BL but WOW, I can’t believe someone said that. I do also know what you’re talking about though and have felt that way a lot of the time specifically since I started at a weight that is a goal for a lot of people. I’ve never really felt like I got kicked out from blogland but it has always been in the back of my mind. I have however felt weird at some of the WW meetings. The only good thing is that we have the at work program so it’s the same people most of the time and you see them more regularly since you all work together, but I have had people flat out say “why are YOU doing WW” in not a very nice way. I can’t speak for everyone but I won’t kick you out.
I personally think having Lifetimers around is a good thing because it does show that it is a lifestyle change and there are always struggles. That is part of the reason I love Roni’s blog so much, she is proof that there is not cure. We’re all human and struggle if we stop trying.
I’m guilty of thinking that way, dang it! When I see a thin person that I don’t know, I just assume they have it easy. After all, aren’t they thin?! I have been thin a couple of times and I bet people probably never realized everyday was a stuggle for me to stay that way…and not i’m back, once again, to NOT being thin. I agree with you and i’m going to make an effort to stop thinking that way about thin/healthy people! Thanks for pointing that out.
Hey Erin, I hear you!!
As a Lifetime member I try and go every week to the meetings. I feel that they were a key to getting to Lifetime and I know too many people who hit lifetime, thought they were “cured” and now are above their goal weight.
I try and talk to the other people about what worked for me and what I’m currently doing (or not doing). And, I’d like to lose another 10 pounds or so, but I am just not motivated enough right now to do it. That’s embarrassing to say, but true. I’m doing some journaling and some working out but I’m not willing to put the whole package together to lose these last 10 pounds. Maybe confessing that will be the motivation that I need to pull it together.
I will still be here reading about your athletic endeavors (even when you are at goal)!!
wow. wow. wow. This is soooooooooo true. Wouldn’t it be neat if they had a “lifetime” meeting??? So lifetimers could talk about Lifetime issues…. and feel the support of others who face the daily struggle of maintaining… I think it would be need if they could focus on that aspect too. I KNOW this will be my battle for the rest of my life. And so it HAS to be a “LIVE-IT” not a diet!
so, funny story, a few years ago I actually auditioned for the Biggest Loser. The casting call asked for women who wanted to lose 60 or more pounds, and at the time I wanted to lose exactly 60 to reach my goal. Me, on a bench with about 40 women who were, admittedly, twice my size.. when the casting assistant came through asking what people where there for there was such camaraderie! yeah! losing weight! She got to me and asked, and when I said I was there for the Biggest Loser the other women went BALLISTIC and really ostracized me!!! it was worse than high school, worse than I’d ever felt being fatter than i was at that point… I went in to audition anyway and ranted at the casting agents about how f*cked up our society is that women aren’t supportive and that each individual weight loss is a very personal struggle. Just because I didn’t need to lose 200 pounds didn’t mean I was by any means HEALTHY. They liked me. Just not enough to cast me. At least I said my peace.
Anyway. I can relate. And having a best bud who has been maintaining her little Britney bod for two years and hearing her still being mindful of it, I’ll never kick anyone out of the Dub Club.