OK, I continued to kind of be in a funk all day long UNTIL I went and worked out. I immediately started to feel a million times better! I came home and fixed a Lean Cuisine frozen bag meal thing, lol…Chicken, pasta, veggies and cheese - only 4pts a serving! Also had a serving of green beans, drinking that water constantly, and watched Shark Week

I feel like a new woman compared to how I felt when I wrote my first post earlier. Talk about being a downer, I apologize! Isn’t it funny how one event can totally skew your perception of everything else? Like I had an AMAZING weekend! Great times with my best friends, wonderful memories, hilarious pictures, just a GREAT time! However, I bet you didn’t pick that up from the first post…the first post was just a bunch of me complaining, wah wah Kristi, wah wah - lol.

Please stick with me readers, I promise I am a VERY upbeat person! It’s just that writing is so completely therapuetic for me that once I start typing out emotions, I can’t stop. Unfortunately, I chose to elaborate on the negative instead of the positive. Isn’t it funny how it always seems easier to talk about the bad things instead of the good? Why is that? Hmmm…something to ponder. But with that aside, here is the menu for today! Back on track again!

 OK so I totally underate today which I know is not good either but I honestly only ate when I WAS hungry. I think due to my funk and exhaustion, I just didn’t have an appetite. I don’t doubt things will be back to normal tomorrow (in that I will consume all the points I am supposed to, haha).

But anyways, thank you for letting me have this blog. I don’t really know who all reads it and if no one really does, that’s fine by me. I can’t begin to explain how much this has already begun to help me on my journey. My personal thanks to Roni for setting up such an amazing website and providing this outlet for people like myself! Hope everyone had a wonderful day today and good luck tomorrow!

OK wow…weekends like the one I had leave me just exhausted on Monday mornings (like can I please lay my head down on my desk and sleep-exhausted!)

Now that it’s lunch time, I have a little more energy and the jitteriness of the coffee is finally wearing off (I was feeling kind of high for a while, NOT good!) Wow, what a weekend I had in deed. It makes me tired thinking about it, lol. It was an absolutely wonderful and fun weekend. It started off great too in terms of my staying on track but somehow I just fell HARD off that bandwagon yesterday. Let me start with Friday though.

Friday after work, I ran over to the gym, did an hour of circuit training weights - it felt great! Rushed home, showered, changed and met up with some girlfriends for dinner. It was one of my best friends last weekend in Austin as she was moving back home for good now that we’ve graduated so we were “celebrating” all weekend long. We opted for Greek food, where I totally behaved and got a grilled chicken Greek salad, dressing on the side and didn’t even come close to finishing it. Yay for Kristi! Afterwards we went and saw “I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry” it’s hilarious - I totally recommend everyone to see it!

Saturday, woke up quite early and couldn’t go back to bed - I hate that. I ran a million and one errands (OK seriously, thinking about the weekend makes me SO tired that I just let out a HUGE sigh and 2 people in the office commented on it, lol…wow). Cut to the evening, dinner with the girlfriends again - Chinese food. I have a cup of Hot and Sour soup and an order of Chicken and veggies - pretty good again I must say! (At least I think so, haven’t looked up the points on the soup but I thought a cup couldn’t hurt and I didn’t even come close to finishing my entree). So then we go over to a girlfriend’s house to get ready for the night, go downtown and have tons of fun. Check off Saturday to being pretty good. I didn’t actually get to go to the gym but I did so much running around I figure that’s got to count for something - 1 point maybe? haha

Sunday - a completely lazy day because I was so tired. I know what I’ve listed so far doesn’t sound like a lot but I truly just don’t have the energy to go into detail what all we really did - yeah, I’m THAT tired (actually I also think I’m so tired because of all I know I need to get accomplished this evening and the rest of the week to prepare for my new roomie moving in this weekend). I met up with another girlfriend and we lazed out at the pool all day, soaking up what little sun Austin was finally thankful to get. Why is it that after being in the pool (or beach) just water for that matter, whether you swim laps or not - it makes you have an appetite? And why did I totally agree to Kayla’s idea to order pizza?? My rationalization was that I haven’t ordered pizza or had it in literally years - no exaggeration. So I tell her I’m down with the idea - we order a pepperoni (I pick off the pepperoni though - not a fan) I also prefer thin crust but yeah, that didn’t happen. It didn’t stop me from eating TWO slices though. Sad thing is I was pretty dang full after one but I still went for the 2nd one - I have no clue what I was thinking there. And as if that wasn’t bad enough, we ordered cinnamon sticks and I had like 4 of those! Uhhh, I did NOT feel good afterwards!! However did that stop me from going home, watching Shark Week (I LOOOVE Shark Week on the Discovery Channel) and pigging out on pretzels and dip two hours later? Absolutely not! Horrible!

I know it’s not good to beat yourself up for your slip ups but man, it just really sucks to know I did so well all week long and pretty much let it all go to waste yesterday. Fortunately though I am back on track today, have plans to do weight training AND cardio after I get off work and already have a healthy dinner planned out. And I’m preparing artichoke - I LOVE artichoke!! But yeah…that was my weekend. Sorry if the writing in this post is just all over the place but my head isn’t quite in it right now. But at least I got it out there - I’m holding myself accountable (maybe too much so) and I’m moving forward. And I also apologize for this whole post being kind of down - it’s just one of those days I suppose. I just need to keep reminding myself that “Every 5 minutes is a new 5 minutes!”

But seriously, why does the food, snacks, cakes, cookies, etc. always have to sit on my desk?? Our office isn’t huge. My desk is out in the middle across the room from the conference table. Usually food goes on the conference table but we are in the middle of a HUGE project so there are documents, journals, etc. covering the table. That leaves the chocolate covered dried cherries, chocolate nut coffee cake, and any other random goodies that are brought in during the week, on my desk. Gotta love it! Fortunately the past two days I have totally stayed strong (had some chocolate cherries on Monday). This coffee cake is kind of tempting though…not gonna lie. But I will resist!

Want to know what an awesome motivator is? Looking back at pictures of myself from my lowest weight (when I somehow didn’t think I looked good enough - I had my uber sensitive body conscious goggles on back then - gosh). But yeah, it’s amazing motivation to stick to the plan, to reach that weight again and surpass it. I forget whose blog I was reading and I apologize for not being able to give proper credit here, but she had a quote that I liked. It went something along the lines of ” Eating that certain food might feel good now, but not as good as skinny feels,” and damn if that isn’t true!

So here’s to my strength to not give into the temptation that sits on my desk!

OK first of all, let me just apologize for my ranting and raving blog last night. I was in a WHOLE lot of frustration and my fingers just FLEW away on the keyboard. I hope I didn’t scare anyone off from possibly reading my blog, lol. But with that aside, I DO love me some Hairspray. Ok, I have been singing my whole life, always in choirs. I was in the performance choir at UT and with that comes my love for musicals. I have seen Hairspray TWICE now and I can’t stop singing the songs! I wake up singing them, I sing them at work, I work out to Hairspray…I am loving me some Hairspray and I think everyone should go see it! Now! Haha…so yes, great movie, good music, fun dancing, 2 thumbs up.

Today was a million times better than yesterday. I surprisingly slept really well last night. I got to work on time today. I had things to do at work (which is ALWAYS nice), I got to go do 50 minutes of cardio at the gym, go to the grocery store and now I might even be going out for some karaoke with friends. An all around great day. Despite the fact that it POURED all day long. I don’t know what this weather is all about but I’d definitely be OK with some sunshine soon.

 I had one moment of weakness as I finally allowed myself to sit down and watch my guilty pleasure “So You Think You Can Dance” (are yall seeing a pattern here? lol) It had been a while since I had eaten, 5 hours to be exact, which was my fault and that never bodes well. I definitely did some snacking in front of the TV (snacking is an understatement). But right after I went to the gym so hopefully I balanced out at the end of the day. And I surprisingly, am not beating myself up for my slip up. I have adopted by brother’s motto: “Every 5 minutes is a new 5 minutes!” So if you had a bad 5 minutes, don’t worry about it, you got a new 5 minutes coming around and you can make them better. And that’s what I did. I can’t let things like that get me down but hopefully learn from my mistakes, journal them, hold myself accountable at the end of the day and move on. So here goes nothing…

OK, I won’t be putting in my food journal tonight because I don’t have the patience for it. All I know is that I was definitely UNDER my points. Today was a sucky day, seriously. Couldn’t sleep all night long because of some weird pain in my middle back that would randomly shoot pains into my stomach. It was raining outside which triggered a migraine so I could barely talk, let alone get anything accomplished at work. I get sent home early where I cat nap and use a heating pad, take medicine and all that good stuff only to NOT feel better at all. I decided to go do some cardio to maybe get the blood flowing in that area, loosen things up, THAT doesn’t help either. I come home, take a shower and get ready to go over to that special someone’s house, who really shouldn’t even be called that anymore because HE is my frustration. But putting that aside for a moment, he always puts me in a good mood (well when he’s not being a selfish a**hole that is). So for about 3-4 hours, I was in a good mood. For the first time all day, I was in a good mood. Then before I left his house we had some “vacation” plans to talk about and THIS is when he turned into his crappy selfish self. I am SO sorry to curse but I guess he brings that out in me. It would literally take forever to go into everything and I can only assume that over time, and several blogs, anyone that might possibly read my blog on a semi-regular basis will get to know the FULL story of Mr. C and all his “glory.” And I hate dogging him out like this but he seriously does it to himself by being this 31 y.o selfish BOY! When he’s not being selfish he is the most amazing person/friend/whatever he is. I’ve come to accept his bad with his good but dang when his bad arises is it ever frustrating. So yeah, that’s all I have to say, I needed to vent and this seemed the perfect way. I’m extremely proud of myself though because for once, I am NOT going to eat out my frustration over him. Nothing is going in this mouth but more advil and water, lol. Ok, enough ranting and raving. I’ll post a quickie food journal just because I want to see it…

It’s funny, I’ve been on some high all day long and I think it’s just over the excitement of getting my life back on track, it feels great! So far today I’ve done an excellent job. I have to admit that I was a little nervous about dinner tonight. One of my good friends from New York is in town and a group of us are going out to eat in honor of his brief return. I’ve never been to this resturant before however, they have a menu online with, to my pleasant surprise, super yummy and healthy options! I’m going to order the Southwestern Grilled Chicken pita! The only thing I have to be careful of tonight is that this place is famous for its at-your-table s’mores! Ohhhh that sounds just delicious. I haven’t had a s’more in ages! I might allow myself to have one but I don’t know yet, guess time will tell.  But so far, here are the current day’s stats:

*Quick edit to say I wasn’t as strong as I would have hoped (I got to be help responsible somehow). I did have the Southwestern Grilled Chicken pita and it was DELICIOUS! But I also had two s’mores (but in my defense, I split up the chocolate that should have been used on one bar and made it into two s’mores) and then we went to a late movie where I had one fried pickle spear and one mozzarella stick. GLUTEN! I’m going to hang my head in shame!*

Woo hoo! My first blog! I am so excited about this and hope that it goes well. And I honestly do hope people enjoy reading this as much as I know I will enjoy writing them.  

After a LONG, party-filled, wedding-filled, friend’s in from out of town-filled weekend (where I ate reasonably well I must say!) today was the first day of the new me, the new lady. My grandma always used to tell me, once I set my mind on something, it WOULD get done. There was never a question of IF I was capable but WHEN I really wanted to do it. Well my mind is set and I really want this, for ME this time. That’s why I think this time around is going to be so different and I can’t wait!

 Here goes nothing with the food journal!