I have the yummiest dinner last night! I was feeling creative so I mixed up a batch of homemade puttanesca sauce…it was delicious. Flavorful and tasty and not too heavy!

First, I sauteed two shallots and one diced red pepper in some olive oil. When those had gotten carmely and sweet, I added a can of diced tomatos, salt, pepper, and Italian seasoning. (Easy on the salt…you’ll be adding more salty things later). When the sauce was partially reduced, I added a big handful of chopped fresh basil, a pinch of red pepper flakes, a couple tablespoons of capers, a squirt of anchovy paste, and a drained 6 oz. can of albacore tuna. (Traditional puttanesca sauce has olives in it, but the husband hates them, so I just added extra capers instead.) I realized a bit late that I didn’t have nearly enough fresh garlic, so I compensated by crushing in the garlic at the very last minute and adding a little garlic powder. Served it over whole wheat spaghetti with a grating of fresh parmesan. Delicious! And the husband loved it!

I had a really hungry day yesterday. I just wanted to eat everything in sight. My strategy when that happens is to nibble all day long, but stick to very healthy foods and try to keep portion sizes small. If I try to convince myself that I don’t need food, I just end up binging later. I did okay…ate CONSTANTLY, but mainly stuck to healthy food.

Food:
–Small orange
–Two tsp peanut butter
–1/4 cup Greek style nonfat yogurt
–Pumpkin oatmeal pancakes
–Coffee with cream

–1/4 cup raisin pistachio trail mix

–Small orange
–Black beans, tomato and avocado wrapped in a 50 calorie low carb tortilla

–Light rye crackers and laughing cow
–v-8
–Bell pepper sticks

–Luna bar

–Banana

–1 cup whole wheat pasta with puttanesca sauce

–.3 oz 85% dark chocolate

–Glass of nonfat milk
–Two pieces of dried tamarind

Steps: 10085

This is just quick. I know I’m late on this one, but I have discovered that I LOVE sweet potato fries! Costco sells them pre-cut up in big bags, so I decided to try them out. They were totally delicious. The only problem was that I didn’t use any nonstick spray or oil on the sheet, so they stuck and and got kind of charred. Next time I will try using some cooking spray and see if that helps!

Food:
–One egg omelet with spinach and goat cheese (1 tbsp). (used about 1/2-1 tsp olive oil in prep)
–Two baby tomato flowers
–6 strawberries

–1/2 small brownie

–2.5oz catfish, tomato and zucchini over whole wheat spaghetti in lemon caper butter sauce
–Small handful of roasted chickpeas

–10 pistachios & 4 raisins

–3 large strawberries
–1/2 Ezekiel English muffin with peanut butter
-.25 cup nonfat yogurt

–1/2 mango
–sweet potato fries
–1/2 of a large mustard rubbed pork chop
–Roasted asparagus

–Small orange

I went shopping on Friday and bought lots of cute new clothes. I was very happy. Shopping is a lot more fun when you have less excess weight on you!

Many people talk about how it’s better to judge your size based on the fit of your clothes rather than your weight. While weight is a very imperfect measure, clothing size has always been a problematic gauge for me. Because of my frame and the places where I hold and don’t hold weight, my pants size changes pretty slowly even if I’ve put on quite a bit of weight. Even at my heaviest, a lot of the clothes in my closet were size 6. Size 6 is a completely respectable size to be, so it was easy to rationalize away my weight gain. I’ve lost 13 pounds now, but I’m still defeinitely a size 6. If I wasn’t weighing myself, I probably wouldn’t have any idea how far I’d come.

That said, shopping at my current size is a LOT more fun! When I gain weight, I go up a size in some clothes, but many clothes just stop fitting me, period. No size fits me properly. I don’t carry extra weight well…it creates odd lumps and bumps that just don’t sit well on my frame. I used to go into the store and not be able to find anything that fit me and was flattering. Bigger sizes would look tentish or would hang oddly due to my small frame, and smaller sizes just wouldn’t fit at all. I ended up having a closet full of clothes cut in “curvy” or “loose fit” styles, and none of them looked very good on me. When I went into stores on Friday, everything that I tried on in a size 6 fit me. Dresses, skinny jeans, the works. Granted, some were flattering and some weren’t, but it was such a relief to be able to buy the things that look cute rather than the things that even remotely fit!

I’m up .2 pounds this week. It’s the first time I’ve actually gained since I started blogging, but I think my body is still reeling from everything I put it through before I turned my paper in on Wendnesday. I’m upping my exercise this week and hopefully I will bounce back.

My recalibration attempts are going pretty well. I’ve been eating very healthfully and moderately and I’ve been exercising much more than I normally do. Yesterday I went hiking with my husband and some friends for four hours! It was wonderful, although I’m pretty sore today. I will admit that I have been eating more dessert than I need to. I’ve been out to eat a few times in the last couple of days and my huband baked a batch of fresh chocolate chip cookies to take on the hike as part of our picnic lunch. In my defense, I’ve eaten moderate portions and I’ve only eaten one of the cookies, despite the fact that they are lying around the apartment looking tempting. I’ve enjoyed my treats, but I’m realizing that I just don’t need to get dessert every time I go out to eat just because other people are having it. Even if I eat moderately and have room in my caloric “budget,” I don’t feel my best when I put rich dessert into my body day after day. I’m actually really proud of myself that I’ve noticed that. I’ve become so much more in tune with my body, and I am really proud of that.

The paper finally got finished and turned in yesterday afternoon, but not before it had managed to induce some serious carb binging. I pulled an all-nighter trying to finish the stupid thing, meaning that I totally screwed up my inner clock and needed a lot of food and caffeine to stay alert. I got mildly sick and couldn’t stomach anything with a lot of fiber in it. Thus, I was pretty much gorging on white flour for 36 hours. I haven’t eaten like that in a very, very long time.

Today was my “reset” day. My goal is to remind my body what the normal routine looks like (or at least should look like). I had the day off from school today, which helped. I got a good night of sleep and hit the gym first thing when I woke up. I got in a good hour long workout, then walked to the grocery store and stocked up on produce (three mile round trip!). I wasn’t really hungry at first, but I did my best to make myself eat some light, tasty, nutritious food on a semi-regular schedule. I’m loading up on water, and I’m trying extra hard to get in my protein and veggies. This feels a lot better!

Food log (so far):

–One egg omelet with goat cheese and basil
–Two roma tomato “flowers” with salt and pepper
–Leftover roasted asparagus

–Two light rye crackers with hummus
–Big bowl of husband’s chicken vegetable soup (it’s the best I’ve ever tasted…I don’t know how he does it)

–1/2 cup high fiber cereal with a sliced strawberry and lowfat milk

–Diced mango
–Spicy roasted chickpeas
–3 oz. herbed catfish with tomatoes and fresh basil
–Crunchy mixed veggies marinated in balsamic vinegar

The husband made me a completely delicious dinner for Easter yesterday. We started with an appetizer of my request…sliced apple topped with dabs of goat cheese, a few toasted walnuts, and a drizzle of honey. I had something like that in a restaurant once and fell in love with the concept. You can use just about any kind of nut or good cheese, and you can substitute pears or figs for the fruit. It’s fun and decadent, but basically healthy. Next, I had a cup of the husband’s lemony white bean soup…very light and springy. For the main course, I had a small portion of herb rubbed lamb served with a big helping of crunchy vegetables marinated in balsamic vinegar. I also had a glass of nice red wine. For dessert, I had two juicy chocolate dipped strawberries. Whoever invented the chocolate covered strawberry was genius…they are sexy and decadent and delicious, but they are actually quite reasonably healthy….just berries and a small amount of dark chocolate.

I am proud of my healthy, tasty Easter dinner, and I’m pretty proud of my healthy breakfast and lunch. I am less proud of my afternoon snack. I am really embarassed, but I am going to share my folly with all of you. As I’ve mentioned, I’m working on a really big paper right now and I’ve been hiding away in Starbucks to get away from my husband and other attractive nuisances in my studio apartment. For the most part, I haven’t been getting any sustenance other than the occasional nonfat latte, but yesterday I got pretty hungry. Hunger got the better of me and I turned to the pastry counter. (I know, I know.) I picked the smallest thing I could find that still looked edible, a whole grain zucchini walnut mini muffin. Granted, Starbucks has odd notions of what standard size and miniature are, but I thought it might not be too bad.

All I can say is that I’m proud of myself that I got up the courage (after having downed the muffin) to look up the nutritional information. 390 calories, 24g fat, and 42 g carbs!!! For a MINI muffin! The full size pastries were much worse! Are you kidding me??? I won’t be doing THAT again. When I was at my heaviest, Starbucks pastries were a pretty regular treat for me. I didn’t eat them every day, but eating something that caloric on a regular basis really adds up. I’m not proud that I ate that stupid thing, but I am proud that I owned up to my denial.

Food:
–2/3 cup high fiber cereal with skim milk
–A couple spoonfuls of nonfat fage yogurt
–Coffee with cream

–Seared ahi tuna with fresh salsa
–Steamed broccoli with olive oil
–Nibbles of husband’s food (two bites of chicken with tomato cream sauce and two bites of breadstick dipped in olive oil)

–Nonfat iced latte
–orange
–Mini zucchini muffin

–Glass of red wine
–Apple slices topped with goat cheese, toasted walnuts and a drizzle of honey
–Cup of simple lemon white bean soup
–Grilled lamb with balsamic zucchini and bell pepper salad
–Two chocolate covered strawberries

Exercise: I lost my pedometer I am looking for it, but this may put a dent in my step recording. I walked a fair amount yesterday, but probably not 10,000 steps. Maybe 7,000? I also lifted weights for 40 minutes.

Happy Easter everyone! I hope everyone is having a good holiday. Mine has been good so far…I’ve been working on a paper all day, but the husband is making me dinner tonight! I am excited!

Yesterday I went to a potluck dinner. Those can be troublesome when you are trying to eat healthily, but I fared surprisingly well. I ate a small piece of fish before I left so that I wouldn’t be starving when I went and wouldn’t be tempted to eat any fattening entrees. I brought a big dish of beautiful roasted asparagus so that I would definitely have something healthy to fill up on. Luckily, other people also brought healthy items! So I filled up on my asparagus, mixed raw veggies sticks, fresh berries, and orange slices (straight from the tree in someone’s backyard!). As is my habit, I picked a couple less healthy things that I really wanted. In this case, I took two mini egg rolls and a small helping of some croissant bread pudding (which I also brought).

I know it might sound odd that I brought such a rich, fattening dessert with me. But there is a method to my madness. I know that if I try to convince myself to go entirely without treats at holiday get togethers, I end up caving in at some point and eating a bunch of mediocre junk food. If I bring a dessert, I know how rich it is, so there’s no way I am going to overindulge…no deluding myself into thinking that it’s not that bad. Furthermore, if I make it myself, I know for a fact that it will be delicious and satisfying. I know there have been times in the past where I’ve eaten a mediocre dessert and had decided that the best way to remedy my disappointment was to eat another dessert and then another until I found a really good one…only get through the night feeling sick to my stomach and completely unsatisfied with the mediocre junk I’ve been downing. I know others may disagree, but I know that for me, if I want dessert once in a while, it’s better to eat a small portion of the best version of the real thing that I can get my hands on.

On an unrelated note, I just tried the most wonderful hommeade apple cinnamon oatmeal! It’s very simple. You just cook up some rolled oats and water on the stovetop with grated Granny Smith apple, cinnamon and nutmeg. I grated up about half an apple for a single serving of oatmeal, but you can add more or less to taste. I ate mine with a drizzle of honey on top, but it definitely didn’t need it…the apple adds all the sweetness and flavor you need. I will definitely be making that again!

Today is not an “official” weigh in day for me, but I’m so excited because I actually saw the number on the scale move down for the first time in over two weeks! I was really starting to think that I’d hit a plateau. Of course, one scale reading does not a trend make, but having the scale suddenly drop a pound lower always feels good. I needed a burst of motivation!

Here is yesterday’s food log:

Food:
–Whole wheat protein pancakes with fresh berries and butter
–Coffee with cream

–Veggie wrap (50-calorie low carb tortilla, hummus, fresh veggies)
–orange
–Square of dark chocolate

–Protein bar
–Mini bag of gummi bears

–orange
–Rye cracker with peanut butter

–Dijon chicken
–Roasted asparagus

–More pancakes with strawberries

I’ve really prioritized sleep for the last couple of nights, and yesterday was much better. For the moment, I feel sane.

I really recommend sesame crusted chicken for a fun alternative to breading. I’ve never been a huge fan of breading, but I love this, and it’s really simple. You just pour out lots of roasted or toasted sesame seeds onto a dinner plate or other work surface, mix in some seasonings, and then take a piece of raw chicken or fish and press it down into the sesame seeds. They stick just fine without any egg or flour. Then just throw it into a nonstick pan to cook. There are only two things you have to really watch: 1) Don’t let the seeds burn in the pan. They should be fine, but watch to make sure that your heat isn’t too high. 2) Once you’ve put the meat in the pan, don’t touch until you need to flip it. The seeds have a tendancy to fall off and not be as pretty if you flip the meat back and forth a lot or otherwise move it around. I know that some places charge a lot for sesame seeds, but you can get huge containers of them for cheap in the Asian section of the grocery store.

Food:
–1/2 Ezekiel English muffin with peanut butter
–strawberries
–Coffee with cream

–Veggie sticks
–.5 oz dark chocolate

–Veggie wrap sandwich
–v-8
–Light string cheese

–Trail mix (peanuts and dried fruit)
–Orange

–Sesame crusted chicken
–Bulgar wheat with soy sauce and sesame oil
–cabbage

–Spiced sautéed banana

Steps: 9511

The last few days have been very stressful for me. I’ve had a bunch of big deadlines coming up and I’ve gotten very little sleep. Not sleeping is always a bad thing for me. I’m low energy, restless and can’t tell if I’m hungry or full. The result is that when I don’t sleep, I nearly always binge on carbs.

Monday was bad…I ate basically healthy meals, but the carb snacks were ridiculous. They served to keep me awake, but I sure felt rotten after. Yesterday morning, I started off the day with a very carb heavy breakfast. It wasn’t unhealthy per se, but it was definitely a result of emotion eating. So I decided to try to take control, and I did decently. I ate small lunch with lots of protein and veggies and determined that I was just going to listen to my body for the rest of the day. My body seemed to be saying more than anything that it was confused about the lack of sleep and not feeling great. This is not synonymous with “hungry,” I realized. I ate slowly and mindfully and drank a lot of water. The rest of the day went decently.

I’m not out of the woods yet. I’m still exhausted and trying to recalibrate after all of the sleep deprivation. Wish me luck.

Food:
–Whole wheat scone
–High fiber cereal with skim milk
–orange

–Leftover Stuffed pepper (stuffed with lean beef, veggies and bulgar wheat)
–Light string cheese
–v-8
–Small skim latte

–orange
–Two spiced walnuts

–Two rye crackers with peanut butter and sliced strawberries

–A few bites of corned beef (The husband’s creation. Man, that stuff is heavy! I could only eat a few bites)
–Two little red potatoes
–Big pile of cabbage (delicious…this was the bulk of my dinner)

–Sugar free jello
–orange