I feel terribly that I haven’t been posting more often, but believe me when I say that my life has been utter chaos. My first final is tomorrow and I have been cooped up in the library all day every day getting ready. May 12 is my last final…I’ll resume posting more often after that.

Basic update on how I’m doing: I know that I’m retaining lots of water from the stress, so I’m not weighing myself until finals season is over. I’m doing my best to keep up with my walking and exercise because it really does help me stay sane when I’m stressed out. I’ve definitely had days where things were just too crazy to fit in time at the gym, but I’ve mostly stayed on track.

My appetite is always weird when I’m under stress…I tend to get a little sick to my stomach and can’t handle much heavy food. Oddly, I also get random insatiable cravings for sweets. The husband brought me home a pint of my favorite ice cream to cheer me up after a long study session. I didn’t eat the whole thing in one sitting, but I definitely sneaked spoonfuls straight out of the carton over the next several days. After I’d whittled the container down to about half of its original size, I decided that I’d gotten all the fun out of it that I needed to and threw the rest away. I am proud of myself…a year ago, I would have just left in the freezer and expected my willpower to keep me away from it.

I know that the way I am eating this week isn’t and can’t be a reflection of how I will eat normally, but given that this is a crazy time…I could be doing a lot worse. I promise more posts and updates and fun recipes when finals are over!

The paper finally got finished and turned in yesterday afternoon, but not before it had managed to induce some serious carb binging. I pulled an all-nighter trying to finish the stupid thing, meaning that I totally screwed up my inner clock and needed a lot of food and caffeine to stay alert. I got mildly sick and couldn’t stomach anything with a lot of fiber in it. Thus, I was pretty much gorging on white flour for 36 hours. I haven’t eaten like that in a very, very long time.

Today was my “reset” day. My goal is to remind my body what the normal routine looks like (or at least should look like). I had the day off from school today, which helped. I got a good night of sleep and hit the gym first thing when I woke up. I got in a good hour long workout, then walked to the grocery store and stocked up on produce (three mile round trip!). I wasn’t really hungry at first, but I did my best to make myself eat some light, tasty, nutritious food on a semi-regular schedule. I’m loading up on water, and I’m trying extra hard to get in my protein and veggies. This feels a lot better!

Food log (so far):

–One egg omelet with goat cheese and basil
–Two roma tomato “flowers” with salt and pepper
–Leftover roasted asparagus

–Two light rye crackers with hummus
–Big bowl of husband’s chicken vegetable soup (it’s the best I’ve ever tasted…I don’t know how he does it)

–1/2 cup high fiber cereal with a sliced strawberry and lowfat milk

–Diced mango
–Spicy roasted chickpeas
–3 oz. herbed catfish with tomatoes and fresh basil
–Crunchy mixed veggies marinated in balsamic vinegar

The husband made me a completely delicious dinner for Easter yesterday. We started with an appetizer of my request…sliced apple topped with dabs of goat cheese, a few toasted walnuts, and a drizzle of honey. I had something like that in a restaurant once and fell in love with the concept. You can use just about any kind of nut or good cheese, and you can substitute pears or figs for the fruit. It’s fun and decadent, but basically healthy. Next, I had a cup of the husband’s lemony white bean soup…very light and springy. For the main course, I had a small portion of herb rubbed lamb served with a big helping of crunchy vegetables marinated in balsamic vinegar. I also had a glass of nice red wine. For dessert, I had two juicy chocolate dipped strawberries. Whoever invented the chocolate covered strawberry was genius…they are sexy and decadent and delicious, but they are actually quite reasonably healthy….just berries and a small amount of dark chocolate.

I am proud of my healthy, tasty Easter dinner, and I’m pretty proud of my healthy breakfast and lunch. I am less proud of my afternoon snack. I am really embarassed, but I am going to share my folly with all of you. As I’ve mentioned, I’m working on a really big paper right now and I’ve been hiding away in Starbucks to get away from my husband and other attractive nuisances in my studio apartment. For the most part, I haven’t been getting any sustenance other than the occasional nonfat latte, but yesterday I got pretty hungry. Hunger got the better of me and I turned to the pastry counter. (I know, I know.) I picked the smallest thing I could find that still looked edible, a whole grain zucchini walnut mini muffin. Granted, Starbucks has odd notions of what standard size and miniature are, but I thought it might not be too bad.

All I can say is that I’m proud of myself that I got up the courage (after having downed the muffin) to look up the nutritional information. 390 calories, 24g fat, and 42 g carbs!!! For a MINI muffin! The full size pastries were much worse! Are you kidding me??? I won’t be doing THAT again. When I was at my heaviest, Starbucks pastries were a pretty regular treat for me. I didn’t eat them every day, but eating something that caloric on a regular basis really adds up. I’m not proud that I ate that stupid thing, but I am proud that I owned up to my denial.

Food:
–2/3 cup high fiber cereal with skim milk
–A couple spoonfuls of nonfat fage yogurt
–Coffee with cream

–Seared ahi tuna with fresh salsa
–Steamed broccoli with olive oil
–Nibbles of husband’s food (two bites of chicken with tomato cream sauce and two bites of breadstick dipped in olive oil)

–Nonfat iced latte
–orange
–Mini zucchini muffin

–Glass of red wine
–Apple slices topped with goat cheese, toasted walnuts and a drizzle of honey
–Cup of simple lemon white bean soup
–Grilled lamb with balsamic zucchini and bell pepper salad
–Two chocolate covered strawberries

Exercise: I lost my pedometer I am looking for it, but this may put a dent in my step recording. I walked a fair amount yesterday, but probably not 10,000 steps. Maybe 7,000? I also lifted weights for 40 minutes.