DIETS make you FAT!

Will it ever go away?  This desire to just EAT?  Not ’cause I’m hungry, just because I want to eat.  Today’s been decent, made amazing stuffed bell peppers (my whole family LOVES them) and ate one for lunch, one for dinner…not bad, I’m on points…but now, late at night I want to go in open the fridge and just snarf whatever I can find.  I’m not even hungry!  I just love food…too much.

I guess it will be  a life long battle.  Not a battle really, just a life long committment…do I want to be heavy and uncomfortable and unhealthy while indulging this urge to eat?  Or do I want to feel good inside and out, wear cute clothes, feel comfortable in my own skin, and be able to keep up with my kids…while exercising a little self control?   Now that I see it in print on my computer screen, I like the self control option.

I’ve been better at tracking and writing down my eating today, and over the weekend.  Yay.  I just want to feel my jeans getting looser.  I want to feel that “I’m in control” feeling.  And…since now I’m questioning when I want to eat, instead of just doing it, that’s a positive.

One good thing…a few days ago, I was on the phone with my hub, and absentmindedly opened my “baking” cupboard, put some chocolate chips in a bowl, melted them in the microwave, took a bite…and asked myself, “What are you doing?”  I stuck the bowl in the sink without so much as a second lick.  It didn’t even taste good anyway!  What was that?  Literally my brain was not aware of what my hands were doing.  It was wierd. And I stopped.  Go me!

Tomorrow, looking forward to working out with my bands again…weekends are hard because we’re just busy all the time and I don’t get my workouts in.  Tomorrow, and this week, all week, for sure.

Hub and I will be adding a garage to our property this spring, and I cant wait!  We need it, we need a route into our house that does not involve everyone (guests included) tromping thru my laundry room and kitchen (which is never clean)  We need a “stop and dump” place for books, coats, keys, work stuff…that is NOT my kitchen counter or table…so we’re adding a garage and a door that will open directly into our home office, and which will also re route guest to the FRONT door, which, at this point, for whatever reason, no one enters!  The one room (living room) which is usually clean.  Yay!  I’m excited…we’re also going to landscape the yard, add a fence, and are even thinking of adding a hot tub (which I love, when we lived in apartments years ago we were in it every single night summer or winter) and an above ground pool and deck.  Fun!   We’ll see…it’s an investment, but we all love to dunk in pools…it could happen.  So…I have to look good in a swimsuit by this summer for all the BBQ’s we’ll be hosting in our new backyard!  I CANNOT wait for spring.

Snow is melting finally, but now its windy and chilly…spring, hurry!

Ok, I’m tired and I’m off to hit the pillow. Good night!