Category Archive

You know that every overweight person WANTS to lose the weight? They do. I mean how many times have I wished I was thin? I am convinced that no one wants to be fat. At least most of us.

Yesterday I was home and watched this gal who has lost over 100 pounds in a year, she started eating healthy and exercising. That is all she did. Sounds pretty simple. But we all know it isn’t. She said that the reason she believed she could do it was “Because, I really wanted it!” That comment struck me, because I say I want to lose weight…but do I really want to? She said it was hard. The hardest thing she has ever done. It involved really looking at the foods she ate. Exercising EVERY DAY. Said she would walk 20 minutes and run 30 seconds. Then every day she added another 30 seconds running. Until one day she was running all 20 minutes. By then she had lost 50 pounds.

Losing weigth isn’t easy. We all know that. It is hard! Is it possible? Yes!

How bad to I want this? BAD!

Am I worth it? Hell Yes!

How committed am I? I am totally 100% committed!

Yesterday was a day!  Wow!  I have been super busy this week and encountered a really evil person (well really two evil people, but mainly one got me going!).

We have some visitors in our office and one of the ladies totally took offense to a very simple request and blew up and it escalated from there.    She basically had a hissy fit and I had to get upper management involved and they stepped in and handled it.  Management totally supported me, which was fantastic, but still I was very upset.  It was stressful.

My reaction?  I totally wanted to eat!  Isn’t that funny!  Not really funny, but it such a cliche’.   As soon as the urge hit me I knew why!  I am an emotional eater!  Who knew?!?   I was going to surpress these feelings of stress and anger with food!  I have a “goodie” drawer here at work.  Mainly there is Kashi bars, Gnu bars, FiberOne Bars….but, I do keep limited amounts of chocolate at my desk for those days….but I didn’t touch it!  Nor, did I have a drink or glass of wine when I got home!  I acknowledged my feelings and knew that food or drink was not the way to resolve what I was feeling.  It is o.k. to feel stress.

I tell you it feels really good to be in control!  In fact it feels awesome.

So, I’ve been MIA from the boards lately.

I am in a funk and cannot quite get myself out of it. I’m pretty sure it is because I am up for a new job and and feeling like I am not going to get it. Which is ok, because I love my current job…but still I kind of wanted it! It is more money, more flexibility.

So, yet again I can attribute my bad eating to my “feelings”….why oh, why do I allow my feelings to dictate my food intake? Will I ever conquer this? At least I am aware it is happening. Maybe that is progress?

I have been counting points until dinner time, then I blow it. Eating a few too many Dove chocolates, crackers, tortilla chips, etc. Not really blowing it, but not really caring too much either. Last night I mentally counted my points in my head and I was over by 2. Well, that isn’t a big deal…but I probably have been over 2 or more every night. I am never going to lose this weight if I continue with this trend. Then I will get frustrated and give up….and that is NOT an option.

So here is my solution to break out of the funk (isn’t that a song from the 70’s? jk)…

1. Count ALL points! Really count. Look it up, count it out and measure, if possible.
2. Exercise!
3. Just say NO to Dove chocolate…unless it is within the allotted points for the day!
4. Quit drinking wine every night. Limit it to once a week.

Looking forward to a wonderfun, on track weekend!

Weighing in today and I lost .5 pounds!  Which isn’t a fantastic weight loss, but well it kind of is to me.  I have weighed in at the same weight for about 3 weeks now and well finally I am down .5 pounds!  yeeeee haaaawwww!

I am doing the same thing I always have, eating on track (maybe not exercising as much….but still I have been moving!)

I acknowledge that I am a slow loser.  I know this and have learned to accept it.  I know that I am not going to lose 50 pounds in 6 months.  I have been on program for 6 months (yesterday was my 6 month anniversary) and I haven’t reached the 30 pound mark yet.  But, it is ok.  I am really ok with it.  Because I know that if I stay on track I will lose all the weight I want to.  It may take 2 years or maybe 3?  I honestly don’t care.  What I care about is being healthy and being on the road to getting healthy.   And the numbers on the scale are getting smaller!  What more could a girl hope for?

I haven’t posted all week and not sure why?

My eating was pretty good all week.  Yesterday I did go out for lunch and ate a hamburger (not the fast food kind it was from a pub) and boy I wasn’t hungry for the rest of the day.  I don’t think I have had a regular burger in 6 months.  All the burgers I have eaten were either Boca or Chicken (and not the crispy fried kind either!)  It was a splurge and sometimes that is ok as long as it only happens once in a while.  The fear is that it is a slippery slope and the unhealthy, fatty foods will once again take over my diet.  But, I am not going to let that happen.  I’m not!

It was a busy week, work was crazy and out of control at times so I am pretty tired.  I interviewed for a different job within the company I work for and I think I have some stiff competition.  So, I’m not that optimistic about getting selected for the new position but that is fine too.  I love my job now.  It is just this new position is a great career move and I am qualified and it would allow me to work from home some of the time.  Which would be great! And well there is the part of the job that would include a pretty hefty pay increase and more money is always good too.

I got a good nights sleep last night and I am going to try and get exercise in this weekend, plan healthy delicious meals, and get plenty of rest and “me” time (the latter is the hardest!)

I am only a few pounds away from the 30 pound mark and would really like to get there soon!

OK, this was my first really bad weekend.

Started out ok, lots of extra points.  Then Saturday I blew it.   Ate a late lunch then didn’t want dinner.  Ate popcorn, licorice, and m&m’s.  All really bad for me.  Then yesterday I just didn’t care.  It wasn’t a horrible day, it just wasn’t good.  I felt really out of sync.  Maybe part of it was husband was grumpy all weekend, which made me grumpy.  I ended up eating or not eating because of emotions - I totally know it.  And I didn’t care!  LOL.  But honestly, the bad eating just made me feel worse!

Today, I am back on track.  I made an awesome soup yesterday afternoon.  It has non fat chicken broth, carrots, celery, orzo, cannelini beans and spinach with italian seasonings.

Here is hoping I am back in sync!

As they say, the past is the past and now it is time to move on!

I have this friend who is so lacking in confidence that I totally get frustrated with her.  She has very poor self image and continues to let people use her, abuse her, and belittle her…and she doesn’t know why.  She says that she is nice.  (and she is, she just isn’t confident in who she is…)

I can get really frustrated when I talk to her because I want to fix her.  I try.  But some people will say the want change, but continue to do what they have always done….you know people like this I’m sure.  They like their misery!  It is comfortable.  (Weight issues are very similar aren’t they?  We say we want to lose weight, yet continue to eat burgers, fries, candy bars, etc. and are so upset that we are still fat!  We want to be thin, yet we don’t do anything to change.)

I think I have good self esteem.  I don’t let anyone take advantage of me.  I stand up for myself.  And I think by losing weight my self confidence is getting stronger and stronger.

I believe I can lose this weight because I am worth it!  I am worth fighting this battle once and for all….maybe the confidence on the inside will finally be reflected on the outside.  That is the goal.

I have brought my lunch to work pretty much every day for almost 6 months now. We have a really nice lunch room that overlooks Elliott Bay here in Seattle. You can see ferries crossing the Sound, Olympic Mountains in the background. It is beautiful. And I pretty much eat my lunch with the same crowd, it usually is very lively and we laugh a lot.

Today I brought leftovers. Which I hardly ever do, but today I brought leftover low-fat cheese lasagna. It is only 4 points for a slice. Yum. So, I heat it up and about a cup of frozen green beans. One of my co-workers looks at my lunch after I have nuked it and says really loud, “Man, that looks great! You can eat that on Weight Watchers?”

I said, “Yes, it is only 4 points!” Then another co-worker says, “You can eat anything on Weight Watchers!”

It was pretty cool to show every one how healthy eating can be delicious too. (And it was really tasty!)

Then I proceeded to bring out my mango and slice it (per Roni’s video instruction, Thank you, Roni! See video post here.)

Now, I have more people drooling.  It was really fun to have people wish they had my lunch and I am on Weight Watchers!

Way cool.

Wow, I have been so hungry the past couple days.  Today I have already eaten whole wheat toast with almond butter and now I am eating a Kashi Go Lean bar.  I bought some Extra gum, but that isn’t going to cut it.  I still have a banana to eat, but dang I am really hungry and it is only 9:00 a.m.  I am trying to be sensitive to my body and eat when I am hungry and not eat when I am not….but this has been going on for a couple days now.  I hardly ever dip into my Flex points, but I am going to today I just know it!

So here is my strategy:  drink lots of water, chem gum, eat my healthy snacks and pray I can keep my hunger pains under control! Good thing I have a drawer full of Fiber One bars, Gnu bars, Kashi Go Lean Bars!

Do you ever just wake up Happy?

Today is just a great day!  I’m not sure why.  The sun is out, I packed my food for the day, I love my husband and my kids.  I love my job (even though I have applied for a new job…same company tho!)  I have great friends.

I can see that Spring is coming.  I heard birds chirping at 6:00 a.m.

Maybe it is because I have a friend whose life is constant drama and it makes me so thankful for my boring, normal life!

I did only lose .5 pounds this week, but I don’t care.  I am on track.  I did indulge in one Girl Scout cookie, but just one.  (It was a Samoa - seriously if I’m gonna indulge that was the way to go!)

It is going to be a great day, I just know it!

This is my 11th day in a row of work and I am so very tired.  I did try to get 8 hours of sleep last night and that has helped a bit.  I usually get 6 or 7.  But, my body is tired.  I had 33 hours of overtime this week!  Good for the paycheck, not so great for my body.

I did exercise tho…yay me!  I didn’t want to, but I did it.

Even though I have been working a tremendous amount, I am really pleased that I am staying on track with my eating.  It seems that working long hours usually goes hand in hand with eating a lot of junk food.  And believe me, there was a lot of junk food!  Piles of candy bars, crackers, chips, cookies….all really BAD food.  So, to defend myself I stopped off at Whole Foods and bought some lowfat, no sugar peanut butter cookies, and some lowfat Kashi energy bars.  This did the trick.  In fact I had people asking me, “What are you eating?  That looks good!”

The most encouraging thing to me is that I am really making changes for the long haul.  Even when I am out of my environment I am sticking with my plan.  That makes me just as happy as seeing my number on the scale go down.  Because then I know that when I do finally hit my goal, I will be able to keep it off.  And that ultimately is what my goal is!

Last night I was watching the Biggest Loser and there was a part of the show where Brittany kept failing to complete her workout.  Jillian put the treadmill up to 14 mph and wanted Brittany to jog for 15 seconds at that speed.  Brittany kept saying she couldn’t do it and would quit 2 seconds before the 15 seconds were up…she was so close and then would quit.  Jillian asked her why she was afraid of success?  And that is when I started crying.

I am afraid of success!  I am afraid of losing weight!  I don’t know why.  Even as I write this I want to cry again.  I have come so close to losing weight before, but never met my goal.  I always give up.

I have tried for years to figure out emotionally why I overeat.  I wasn’t abused, I have a great family, I am loved.  But, this light bulb came on last night that I eat because I am afraid of what being thin represents.  I don’t know why - yet!  But I am going to figure this out.

I guess this is my first layer of the onion.

Because, I am going to go all the way and figuring this out is going to help me stay at my goal once and for all.

I flew home last night Portland and boy was I glad to be home.  Originally, I was only supposed to be gone two nights and then it turned into three.  I went down to assist in the move of our office from one location to a new building.  It was a lot of really hard work but it was fun nevertheless.  I logged in 32 hours of overtime!  Yikes, that will really help the old paycheck!

All of my meals came from restauruants and I really felt like I made the best choices possible.  The scale stayed the same - even though my pants are much looser.  I think that I am probably retaining water, because I didn’t drink near enough water everyday.  So, I figure if I drink my water this week the scale should be down next week.  Not to even mention that I did so much physical labor - I had to have burned off a ton of extra calories.

I am happy with myself for watching my food intake - it makes me really believe that I am in this for the long haul.  That the changes I have made in my eating are life changes and not just “a diet”.

Yikes!  This is a hard question.  I’m with Alli on this one, I definitely can list the things I want to change or hate about my body!

So, here goes nothing….I love my dimples.  I love them even more that my face has slimmed down.  And this is really weird, but I love my toes.  The aren’t too long, or too wide - they are the perfect size and shape for my feet.  I don’t think I have ever verbalized that before!  LOL!  I also love my blue eyes.

My week is going good so far.  I have been walking everyday and am feeling stronger.  I’ve been on track with my eating too.

I am facing a challenge this weekend.  I am headed to Portland, Oregon to help our office there move into a new location.  I am flying down tomorrow a.m. and will come back home on Sunday morning.  So, I will be away from home and will be eating out for all my meals.  When I went out of town in December I did great and made great choices…so I am confident I do this again!  I kind of like the challenge to see how I will face being out of the comfort of home.  Wish me luck!

Because, I get home about an hour after my hubby does, I have this great deal with him.  I plan all our meals for each work week night, I shop for all the food, and then I put a list on the fridge of 5 meals he can choose from to prepare for the night.  Then he cooks. It has become one of the best “deals” we have ever made.  It allows me to come home, eat dinner, and then have time to exercise, spend time with the kids without feeling like I cannot “do it all!”  Awesome.

So, last night I got home a few minutes earlier than normal (due to the holiday) he was cooking and we were chatting.  I think it started by me looking at the nutritional contents of the tortilla chips from Trader Joe’s.  The have a lot more fiber than other brands, so they are only 2 pts per serving versus 4 pts.  We started this whole discussion about how in the past 5 months we have both really started to look at WHAT we are eating!  How many calories, how much fat and how much fiber.  We are not blindly putting food in our mouths any longer.

I told him that at work one of my co-workers walked into our lunch room with a giant canister of my favorite macadamia nuts from Hawaii.  They are chocolate covered toffee nuts.  They are really the best!  So, co-worker fills up a bowl of nuts and plops  it in front of me.  O.K., so now I’m tempted.  I ask him if I can see the container.  He looks at it and says, “You don’t want to know.”  I say, “Yes, I do.  If I don’t look, I won’t have any.”  So, I look.  It wasn’t as bad as I thought.  It ended up being 5 pts per serving, and a serving was 5 nuts!  One point each.  These are my favorite….I had 2.  Now mind you, if it was old me I would have eaten 10 without a second glance!  But, now that I know - I can easily fit in an extra 2 points.

I think more than anything else I feel empowered to make the right choices.

Happy President’s Day!

This was a great weekend.

First it was a trip for the family to the dentist for 6 month checkup.  I’m happy to report no cavities all the way around!  Yipee!

I had planned my Valentine’s Day dinner for Saturday night.  Delicious Chicken Milanese, Salad, Wild Rice with pamesean, and Chocolate Lava Cakes for dessert.  This is hubby’s favorite dinner!  I knew it was a “high” point dinner.  But, I ate and it was delicious!

And guess what?  I am down 2 pounds!

I totally stayed within my allotted points and flex points.  And I lost weight.

You gotta love WW’ers.  It is so awesome that I can have a meal like this and still lose!

Also went shopping with my dd and hit some sales this weekend - dang I got some great bargains.   Also, went to Trader Joe’s to get some essentials for the week.

Then I gathered my ds in the car with one of his friends and Buster (our dog) to go to the park.  It was a beautiful sunny day and we totally got in a great walk and my son played at the playground with his friend.  Buster had a great time and so did ds!

I then came home made taco soup for the week and low fat mini corn muffins.

I am all set for another great OP week!

Friday’s are so awesome.  I’m totally ready for the weekend.  I have so much to do, and so little time.  I actually HAVE to work on Monday.  Unlike everyone else in the US!  Oh well.  I work for an accounting firm and well it is “busy season” and we never get President’s day off.

I have had a good week, counting my points and making good choices.  I have not exercised as much as I had wanted but am walking a lot more, so maybe that balances things out.

Valentine’s Day was good.  Hubby got me tulips and a bag of individually wrapped dark chocolate.  Which I love and can have one at a time :o)  I always need a stash of chocolate in the house.  And since it is dark chocolate the kiddies will stay out of it.

I am making a special Valentine’s dinner tomorrow night.  Husband’s favorite meal, Chicken Milanese (breaded chicken breast (fresh bread crumbs and parmesean) and you serve it with lemon butter.  It is way off program, but I will dip into my flex points, which I NEVER do.  I’m also making lava cakes.  Yum.  Total indulgence.  Hope my stomach can handle it!  lol.

It is supposed to be a beautiful weekend, so hopefully that means a visit to the park for a nice long walk with the dog!

Have a great weekend.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Hope everyone’s sweetie is good to them today.

I never do these things, but Sabrina inspired me….so here it goes:

A - Age: 46
B – Bed size: King
C - Chores you hate: Cleaning toilets!  Yuk!  Hubby does it :o)
D - Dessert you love: Chocolate mousse, pretty much anything chocolate
E - Essential start your day item: black coffee
F - Favorite actor(s): Viggo Mortensen, George Clooney, Jeremy Piven
G - Gold or Silver: Silver
H - Height: 5′5″
I - Instruments you play: Clarinet, guitar (neither one very well)
J - Job title: Office Services and Hospitalities Coordinator
K - Kids: 2.  Girl, 15 - Boy, 11
L - Living arrangements: House in Auburn, Washington (25 miles SE of Seattle)
M - My name is: Barbi
N - Nicknames: Barbi is my nickname for Barbara.  No one has ever called me Barbara.  AKA - Babs, Barbola Cola, BB, BSquare, Brownie
O - Overnight hospital stay: 2 c-sections, 2 stays.
P - Pet Peeve:  Ignorance
Q - Favorite quote: “Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.” - Ben Franklin
R - Right or left handed: Right
S - Siblings: 1 older sister, 1 younger sister and 1 younger brother
T - Time you woke up today: 4:45 am
U - Unique habit: don’t really have one
V - Vegetable you hate: brussel sprouts! BLEH!
W - Wishing for:  to win the lottery!
X - X-rays you’ve had: chest (bronchitis/pluresy), teeth
Y - Yummy food you make: Chocolate Souffle, well pretty much everything….I’m a good cook.
Z - Zodiac Sign:  Gemini

I was thinking this morning that it has been (almost) 5 months since I started back on Weight Watchers.  Official day will be February 17th.

A lot has been accomplished in that time.  I am going to list a few:

1.    I have lost 20 pounds!  Yay!  This isn’t as much as I would like, but still I am proud. I am a slow loser and I am ok with that.  I am most proud because I have controlled my eating.  I am making really good choices.   I am eating whole grains, lots of veggies and fruit.   I am planning, I am preparing, I am weighing….I am doing it all right.  Regardless of the weight loss, this is something I need to do for my health.

2.    I am moving!  I am exercising. ‘Nuff said.

3.    I am really in this for good.  I have really decided that this is me now.  I am going to continue this journey no matter how long it takes - I will weigh 140 someday.  I am resolved that if it takes 2 years or 3 years, I will continue and maintain.

4.    I have found a really great site to express my views, gather encouragement, and be inspired…the Weight Watchen blogs.  Thank you Roni!

So, you guys are stuck with me….. :o)

Here is to celebrating many more “anniversaries”

This is such a great question.  And pretty much every one that has responded I can say, “Yes, I feel that way too!”

But, here are my top reasons:

1.    I want to feel comfortable in my own skin!  I don’t want to have to “cover up” - I want to be free to walk in my bathroom naked and not be disgusted every time I look in the mirror - or better yet be able to look at my entire body (and not just look at just my head) for fear of what my body looks like!

2.    I want to see my toes when I look down!  LOL!

3.    I want to walk in the store and pick up a size Large and it be too big!

4.    I want my kids and husband (and me) to be proud of the way I look!

5.    Finally, I want to be the complete package - healthy and beautiful on the inside and the outside!

6.      Ok, one more…I want to be able to put a weight on my drivers license that is TRUE!

There are so many reasons, I could go on and on.

The great news is….I am losing weight and I will meet these goals someday!

Beliveing something is one thing, living it is another!

I believe that if I exercise and eat a controlled diet I will lose weight and get stronger.

So, guess what?

I controlled my diet and lost 2 pounds this week!  I exercised three days last week and cruised through  my work out last night!  I did DDR for about 45 minutes and I rocked!  LOL!

Cool!

It is a pretty simple concept isn’t it?  Yet, we sabotage ourselves into not believing! I guess it gets hard when you are putting in the work and there aren’t results.  That is when we need to believe more….that eventually the results will happen.  That was me last week…I knew I was on track, yet I gained 3 pounds.  My body seems to do that when I start an exercise program, I always gain weight.  But, I’m moving on.

I had a terrific weekend. My mom came for the weekend (she lives about 150 miles away). We had a nice visit. Of course we went out to eat a few times, and I actually made some really good choices. Yay me!

She did tell me that I was “really looking good” in regards to me weight loss. (another Yay!)

My mom lost about 50 pounds three years ago on LA Weight Loss, and she probably has gained 30 pounds back. I was trying to get her to try WWers.   But, we all know that is has to be our OWN decision.

I made chili yesterday, and have my menu planned for every dinner this week. It is such a good feeling to have all the food planned, shopped for, and ready to prepare.

An interesting by-product of taking control of your eating is that you gain control on other parts of your life too. I feel very in-control of my life right now. I feel healthy (from eating good things for me…), I feel strong (from exercising), and I feel happy (for making great choices!)

There was an interesting article in the newspaper yesterday talking about how maybe it isn’t our fault that we are fat, it is because food is so full of fat and the serving sizes are so large. I think it is really convenient to blame every body else and not take responsibility ourself for the choices we make.  Interesting to read.

So, day two of my new exercise routine went well.  I played DDR (Dance Dance Revolution - interactive video game where you dance on a pad and it scores how well you did….really, really fun!) for about 45 minutes.  I was doing it by myself for the first 20 minutes, then hubby came along and wanted to dance with me.  So we plugged in another pad and we did a challenge.  I totally beat him!  It was great.  I was getting the best scores last night!  I was really working up a sweat, it was great.

I am home from work today.  My 15 y.o. dd has a fever, and I really don’t feel comfortable leaving her home when she has a fever…you never know.  So, better safe than sorry.  But, that will allow me to clean my house today.  My mom is coming for the weekend and I was going to have to clean tonight after work.  I  was totally dressed and ready to go to work when dd told me she was sick.  And I was having a really good hair day today!  lol!

Last night was the first night of meeting my goal to exercise after dinner.  So, after doing the dishes I got my dvd and headed to the bonus room to do some Chicometrics.  I did pretty good, I did have to take a couple breaks.  But, I totally can feel it in my abs and thighs today, which is good.

Tonight I want to either walk on the treadmill or do DDR.  We will see what strikes my fancy after dinner.

I’m counting my points and hoping to lose those 3 pounds I gained this week.  I am really trying to drink more water, to see if that helps.  I am feeling a little “moody” due to the time of the month…my pre-period week is always an emotional week for me.  I’m trying to keep myself under control - but honestly I’d like to “go off” on someone today!  LOL!  Hopefully, I can keep that in CHECK!  Maybe I need chocolate!

Yesterday was a good day.

After my weigh in with a 3 pound gain, I picked myself off the floor and started again.  My first gain - it was a little hard to take.

I actually didn’t use all my points yesterday, I had 1.5 points left over.  Yay me!  (I’ll use them up later, I’m sure!)  And I even started using less points, due to being on the cusp of the next level.
I’m still trying to figure out a consistent workout routine.  I think for now my best choice is right after dinner.  I know it isn’t the best time, but it is the best time for my family.  So, 7:00 p.m. - 8:00 p.m will be work out time.  I’m starting tonight.  And I have decided that I am going to do a work out schedule, just like I do for dinner planning.  Every week I plan menus for 5 different dinners, then I grocery shop for all those meals.  Well, my plan is to to do the same for my work outs.  I need variety!  So this week here is my plan….

1)   Dance Dance Revolution (DDR) (at least 30 minutes)

2)   Treadmill - 30 minutes

3)    Chicometrics (DVD I have, good workout)

4)    Bowflex - 20 minutes

I think if I mix these up, I can get good variety and it will get me off my butt.

I feel like I am at a crossroads. I have totally stayed on track since September 17, 2007. I have lost a total of 20 pounds. I am a very SLOOOOOOOW loser. But, I accept that. I tend to lose only 1 pound a week. Again, I accept that.

Today is weigh in day. I gained 3 pounds! I don’t know how. Well, maybe I do. I wasn’t great about counting all my points all week, but 3 pounds!?! I did have 2 glasses of sangria on Friday night, and one glass of wine…then on Saturday night I had 2 mai tai’s…and there was that left over garlic bread that I probably nibbled on 3 pieces……I guess all of that added up. Sheesh. It didn’t feel like a lot, but I’m sure it was.

So, here are my current choice options:

1. Give up! Why bother? My body doesn’t want to lose weight…fat acceptance and all that stuff. (this is the option I have chosen like 1,000 times before…and of course I am still fat! go figure!)

or

2. Dig in deeper! Move on! I know I can do this! So, it is a minor set back. Count every point, exercise and know that I CAN DO THIS - no, I WILL DO THIS!

So, you guessed it…I am picking option 2.

New day, new focus - hopefully a new me.

This has been a fast week!

It has been so cold and gorgeous here every day this week, the sunshine has really made me happy.  I have noticed that is getting lighter in the mornings and is staying lighter longer in the evening, which is a wonderful thing!  I hate the dark.

Lots going on this weekend.  We have Couple Bunco tonight!  I love Couples Bunco!  All the hubbies and significant others get to join us girls, it is loads of fun!  Playing with men is hilarious because they are so competitive and us girls usually play for the social aspect, not to win.  Then tomorrow night a friend is having a 40th birthday party, so we are going to that.  Then Sunday there is another friends kid birthday party.  Yikes.  Sure am glad I don’t like cake!  I mean I kinda do, but I can easily pass it up.

My eating has totally been on track, and have gotten quite a bit of exercise this week.  I did DDR with my 15 y.o. daughter last night, it was totally fun.  I got my first double A last night.  In DDR speak, that is the highest rating you can achieve.  Yay me!

I am plugging away and hoping that the scale will reflect my good choices.

Have a terrific weekend!

I was very excited when I saw that my local grocery store had Cara Cara oranges in! I had them for the first time last year and totally fell in love. I am admittedly not a big orange fan. I love clemintines, satsumas, tangerines - pretty much any easy to peel orange. But, the Cara Cara’s are so delicious I am willing to peel! (I hate the mess, but I love the fruit!)

I just ate another one for my mid afternoon snack and it was delicious!

If you see them in the store, give them a try…I absolutely love them.

I am having a good week so far. The weather here has been so beautiful - sunny by cold. The sunshine totally transforms my mood into happiness! Plus the view from my office at work is so beautiful, I have to share. This is the Puget Sound in Seattle, Washington.

First off…check this out!

Check out Roni’s new contest! I can win a Nutrition Smart Scale from Eat Smart and so can you! Click here for details!

Second off….I lost another 1.5 pounds, which puts me over the 20 pound mark for weight loss. Finally.

The thing that pleases me is that for the past 2 weeks I have lost a 1.5 pounds. And since I usually only lose 1 pound a week, I am very happy.

My weekend didn’t turn out half bad. I was sick on Thursday and Friday (I’m still having some stomach aches, but not enough to make me not eat!) Saturday I went to a wedding shower. It was fun. After we went to a jazz night club. It was pretty fun. The crowd was a bit older, but it was fun and the music was great.

I have this funny little habit every morning when I am toweling off after my shower to tell myself how good I am doing on my eating and how I am totally going to make it to my goal. I kind of laugh at myself, because I really didn’t realize I was doing this until yesterday. It is my little pep talk to myself! I am going to do this! I Am! I think my family, although they support me totally, they don’t really believe I am going to go all the way. And, I don’t blame them. I have tried so many times in the past to try and lose the weight. Bottom line, they love me for who I am. Not to say they wouldn’t be proud of me for losing the weight, they have in the past. I have lost up to 50 pounds before, and then gained it all back. And I know I have to win them over into believing what I believe…that this time it is for good. There is no going back to the old Barbi. This is the new Barbi and she is going to be fabulous!

My week didn’t quite turn out how I had thought it would.  I had some eating challenges facing me (girl’s night out and cooking school) and on Wednesday I got sick.  My head hurts, stomach cramping, slight fever and exhaustion.

That means, no Girls Night Out last night, and no Cooking School tonight.  I am sad to miss these events.

Instead of delicious Thai food last night with the girls, I made chicken noodle soup.  Which delighted my son :o)

I cannot say I am sad about missing all those calories I am no longer going to be confronted with, but I do miss hanging out with my friends.

I am feeling slightly better today, I have had lots of sleep.  My stomach is still churning.  Yuk.

I do have a wedding shower to attend tomorrow night, so hopefully I will feel good enough to attend.

Happy weekend!

I didn’t really think that this week was going to be such a huge challenge, but it has become very interesting.

Yesterday my group at work had chinese food for our lunch meeting.  No big deal, I ate just a small portion.  Well, then I get an email from some friends asking if we all want to meet at our favorite Thai restaurant.  How can I resist?  I love going out with the girls, and I love Thai.  Well, then I totally forgot that Friday night my team at work has reservations for a Cooking School.  This is lots of appetizers, drinks, dinner the whole sch-bang!  Aye Carumba!

So, I am trying to make really good choices in my other meals…trying to be on the low end of my points where I can.  I know I have 35 extra points, but with all these events it is going to be challenging.

And, I think I’m getting sick.  My head feels weird and think I am getting a fever.  I sure hope not…I haven’t been sick in over 2 years.  If I’m not getting sick, I sure am fighting i!  I am hoping that this will pass quickly.  I took an Airborne this morning to ward off the bad germs.

On the positive side, I have noticed that my newer clothes I bought over the holidays are already feeling loose!  While I am excited about that, I just bought them a month a go.  I am happy, really.  My mom hasn’t seen me since September when I started WW’ers and she is coming to visit the first weekend in February.  I am hoping she notices the weight I have lost.  I know it doesn’t matter….but, it does.  lol.   She lost about 50 pounds over 3 years ago on LA Weight Loss (spent big bucks!) and has been pretty good at keeping it off.  Although, she has gained about 20 pounds back in the past year.  So, she totally relates to losing weight.

Sorry, for my rambling.

Hope you all have a great day.

Today is weigh in day and I am down 1.8 pounds!  Yipee!  I am .8 pounds away from 20 pounds lost!  I am very happy!

Yesterday was a really good day.  It was beautiful outside.  The sun was shining and it was warm.  I planned the menu for the week, went grocery shopping.  I finally bought some of the Fiber One bars that Hungry Girl raves about…and all I can say is Yummmy!  Then I washed my car, read my book, did some cleaning and then went out to dinner.  I shared a calzone with hubby.  Honestly, it wasn’t very good.  That is a problem I have.  I am a pretty good cook and honestly, a lot of times I think I can make better food.  And it would be better for me!

I hope you all have a terrific, happy Monday.

Yesterday was a really fun day.

We went to our very good friends wedding.  It was a second marriage for both of them.

The groom has been our friend for almost 20 years.  About 8 years ago he went through a very nasty divorce and he got primary custody of the kids.  He is the best father in the world to his 2 boys.  Honestly, he is like a member of our family.  Then he met his bride to be about 4 years ago, and she fell head over heels in love with him from the beginning.  He was scared and took it very slow.  So, yesterday was really a culmination of all the good, the bad and now we can celebrate that he made it through….and now has a beautiful new bride and 4 step-sons (yes, 4!)  They are a great family and if any body can handle it, they can!  They could be the Brady Bunch with all boys!

What I found really interesting was seeing old friends again.  Honestly, it always has me a little on edge.  I am concerned that when people will see me they will think badly about me because of my weight.  I want to be that girl I was at 25 and only weighed 140.  But, I’m not.  I am working on it.

But, bottom line….they don’t care!  I had a really great time visiting with old friends.  And you know what?  They have gained a few pounds too!  And, I don’t care.  Love and affection is NOT based on how we look.  I know that in my head.  But, sometimes I still cannot believe the things I know.  Does that make sense?

Life is such a journey…and I love the fact that I am still learning, growing and understanding. That means there are new challenges to face.

I don’t know why, buy today I am feeling sassy.  I got a new pair of jeans on (2 sizes smaller) and I am just feeling it today.  I feel like I am thinner (well, I am) and it shows in my attitude.

Tonight I have a party to go to with my girlfriends.  It is a combined Southern Living at Home and Silpada.  I love both lines, so I have to come up with a budget!  It is hosted by one of my bunco pals, and most of the girls attending are my really good friends.  So, it will be fun.

Then tomorrow a very good friend is getting married!  They have been dating for 4 years and it is a second marriage for both of them.  The are like the Brady Bunch - they will have 6 kids between them!  It is a small private affair.  Initially, the wedding was to start at 4:00 p.m, however since we are all HUGE Seattle Seahawks fans the wedding now starts after the game!  LOL!

My eating has been on track, but I have have not seen any movement on the scale.  Hopefully, by Monday morning when I weigh in I will see a loss.  But you know, if it doesn’t I know that I am doing everything right!  I really am.  I am in this for the long haul.  So what if I have  a week or two where I don’t lose?  Honestly, as long as I know I am counting my points, getting exercise I am confident that I will reach my goal.  It might take me two years, but hey I got the time!

Hope you all have a great weekend!

I am going to make it a goal to leave at least one comment a day on other people’s blogs. I know how much it means to me to have someone leave a comment - so I am really going to try and leave at least one comment a day! I love hearing from people….so thank you to everyone who has ever left me a comment. Your words encourage me to keep keeping on!

And this is way cool, I am on the list of most active blogs! I have been waiting for my name to be on the list, and now it is!

One of my biggest goals for the new year is to get into a regular exercise routine. I really love to walk and that is my “go to” exercise, but I really want to do weights too. We have a bowflex machine in the garage, so I have no excuses.

Today, I walked from the train station to my office (this is just over a 1/2 mile) and I plan on walking back to the train station tonight. That will give me a good start.

My struggle is fitting in other exercise. I already get up at 4:45 a.m. every day so I can eat my healthy veggie eggbeaters in the morning, so getting up earlier really wipes me out! I get home from work at 6:00 p.m. and sit down to dinner around 6:30 - 7:00. Then it is homework help time, and clean up the dishes. I usually get “me time” at 8:00, then I’m off to bed somewhere around 9:30 - 10:00. It is tough, and I don’t know how I’m going to do it. I may have to wait until spring and walk on my lunch break. It is pretty rainy this time of year here in Seattle, and working in a professional environment it doesn’t allow me to “dress down” so it can all be challenging.

My plan right now is to walk to and from the train station everyday, and try to do bowflex 3 times a week.

So, I have come to notice a pattern in my weight loss (or lack there of…) What I mean is that every 4th or 5th week I don’t lose any weight. I stay the same. I am sure this is due to my period. I find it really fascinating. The body is a wondrous thing, isn’t it?

I was craving so many munchies this week, I wanted to eat for no reason than I just wanted to eat. I controlled these urges by eating good things, soy crisps, squash fries, low fat tortilla chips and salsa, and vita muffins but still I wanted to eat out of control. I feel good that I made GOOD choices and I could have easily posted a gain - but I didn’t! Sweet.

It is nice to be back to work (weird to say that!) and the kids back to school. We are all back on our schedules, which means eating is scheduled too. I prepared my menu for the week, went grocery shopping and we are all set to have a delicious, healthy and nutritious week.

So, I am at work today sitting at my desk and one of my co-workers stops by to chat.  He looks at me (I am sitting down) and ask if I have changed my makeup?  I say no.  He then asks if I changed my hair?  I say no.  Then he says that I look different today, in a good way.  I smile and say, “Well, I have been losing weight.”  He smiles and congratulates me on losing weight and says, “You look great whatever you are doing keep it up!”  I say, “Thank you, I plan on it!”

This is really the first time someone outside my group of friends that knows I am losing weight has noticed.

I know that I am not losing weight for other peoples approval, but it really does make me feel good when they do notice.  It makes me feel validated and that I am doing a good job.

Sometimes, even though your pants are getting loose or your coat has extra room you really aren’t sure that it is noticeable.  It is nice to have someone take the time to say so.

Yay!  Somebody noticed!

I’m back to work today. No more staying up late, sleeping in late, hanging out with the family. Kids are back in school, and me and hubby are back to work.

I’m really o.k. with it. Don’t get me wrong, I love vacation. But I also love the structure of everyday life. Getting up early, planning meals, the routine helps me stay on track.

I’m feeling good and happy to be on track to continue my weight loss journey. I am ready to see the weight come off!

I am also excited about the little contest here on Weight Watchen (www.weightwatchen.com). I love popcorn. I mean I really love it. For the past year I have not used microwave popcorn due to all the chemicals and various unknown ingredients.  But, I do miss my microwave popcorn. So, I am very excited the Orville Redenbacher (www.orville.com) has a new natural popcorn. I cannot wait to try it.

Once again, I am faced with the beginning of a new year. Is this the year I get to my goal weight? Time will tell, but I will be eating healthy, exercising regularly and will continue to strive for a healthier me. And if by doing all those things I see 145 on the scale, so be it. And if I don’t, but I continue on this journey I will feel very satisfied.

Last night was a great night. We went to dinner at Buca di Beppo in Seattle with some good friends. There were 11 of us in all. I totally ate too much, but then again I had only had a small bowl of taco soup before hand. I did indulge in Chianti (2 glasses) and a small sliver of Dark Chocolate Cake. This was the first time in over 3 months that I just ate what I wanted. But oddly, I never felt out of control.

After dinner we all came to our house and drank Lemon Drops, Martini & Rossi Asti Spumonte, and played Pictionary. It was great fun. I did have a little bit of all the things I love :o)

Here is the best part, today I am totally ready to jump back on track. In the past, after a night like last night I would want to have just a little bit more of all those delicious things….but not today. I cannot tell you how happy I am that I feel this way. For me this is a HUGE accomplishment in an of itself.

I know 2008 is going to be great!

So, I have been on vacation for a while now and it really is great.

I can stay up late, sleep in late, take long soaks in the hot tub, and spend lots and lots of time with my family.

My diet has been good, no major blunders.  I made veggie taco soup last night, and delicata fries.  Both of these things really help me stay on track.

I did go clothes shopping (Macy’s was having amazing sales!)  I bought some new jeans and dress pants for work.  All 2 sizes smaller than my previous pants!  Yeeeee Hawwwww!

My biggest challenge will be New Year’s Eve…we customarily go to Buca De Beppo for dinner.  Which I dearly love.  I am really not concerned, because it is only one day.  Then it is back to eating my healthy, nutritious diet.

Happy New Year! Well, almost.

Here is why I am celebrating this New Year.

1. I have a great new outlook that looks at this weight loss journey as a “forever” instead of a “for now”. I am determined to make life long changes so my body can change forever.

2. I have made great changes these past 3 months! I have made great changes and become much more focused on getting my body in prime working order! Yay!

3. I have a great, supportive family!

4. I have a great job!

The past few days have been challenging food-wise. I have tried to make the best choices. I have indulged somewhat, yet I have never felt out of control. (I could have, because I LOVE wine and there was some really great wine on Christmas Eve!)

I am totally committed to being back on track today. It is a great feeling to know that I can indulge a day or two and then get right back on track. In the past, I would give up. That was the old Barbi. The new Barbi can eat a few cookies and then step away. I love the new Barbi! She is the girl I want to be.

So this is soooooo typical! I have lost weight many times before. But, this is what my body does. I lose 10 pounds pretty quickly then it slows down…..way down. Then from there on in I lose 1 pound a week. One measly little pound. Every Monday morning I step on the scale hoping that just maybe it will be 2 pounds! But alas, no. One pound lost.

I know, I know, I know. This is the healthy range! Ya, ya, ya….but, I want to be like the Biggest Loser people and lose 10 pounds in a WEEK! lol.

But, here is the deal…from here on out I promise to be overjoyed when I see that one pound loss. Because it means I am moving in the right direction. I am losing and all that losing adds up. So what if it takes me 2 years to lose all the weight I need to lose? Maybe if it takes me that long I will have so many new GOOD HABITS it will stick for life. Because, ultimately that is what I want and pray for…for this to be the new me with the really good eating habits. The person who loves squash (I’m still addicted), veggie omelets, whole grain bread, and can plan ahead for special events and still maintain or lose weight.

Slow losing is what I have to embrace, accept and celebrate.

Yay, I lost ONE POUND! Woo HOO!

This week was so busy at work, I thought at one point I was going to lose my mind.  I think everybody in the City of Seattle called me, faxed me, emailed me!

Not really, but it sure felt like it.

My days were a blur.

Then to top it all off, I got this wonderful headache on Tuesday that would not go away!  It is Friday and I still have the headache.  I’m not sure if I am fighting the flu or something but my body feels off.

So, I stayed home from work today to see if I can finally put an end to this horrendous pounding in my head.

But, in spite of the head throbbing, I am still OP.  Yay!

I just watched Roni’s latest video (i’m a little behind - due to hellishly busy work week!) and thought it really was delightful.

Hoping you all have a terrific, on program, good eating decision weekend.

Things are going rather well. I have been thinking about the last 3 months and even though the scale hasn’t moved tremendous amounts (well compared to the Biggest Loser) I feel really great about what I have accomplished. I have totally been on program the entire time, I haven’t indulged over my allotted points once. That is a HUGE accomplishment. Plus, I am feeling so much better! I can really tell when I wake up on the morning, I am really refreshed. Healthy eating is so much better for the body. And losing weight is great too.

I really want to hit the 20 pound mark by Christmas, but if I don’t I can live with it because I know eventually I will get there.

I am not sure why right now I am able to stay on track. It is a funny thing. I have done WW’ers so many times in the past…and most of the times it lasted about 2 months. I mean I have stayed on track before for up to 5 months and lost around 50 pounds - but gained it all back.

But. it does feel different this time…I feel strong in spirit. I cannot describe it or even explain it, but my spirit is really strong right now. I can plan my points so easily, it has become effortless. As long as I keep my kitchen stocked with the right foods, I know I am on track for success.

Something really strange happened the other day. Really strange. I craved BROCOLLI! Isn’t that the weirdest thing? Not chocolate, or peanuts, or chips…but BROCOLLI. I think that is way cool.

If I could take a drug to make my spirit feel this strong I would! (LOL!) But, thankfully for some reason right now it has become strong in its own.

Here is hoping that it will continue to be strong until I am able to see this journey all they way through to the end and keep this weight off forever. I want to do what the Biggest Loser people did last night, bury the pounds they have lost never to meet them again in this lifetime. That would be the coolest thing EVER!

Here is wishing all of you strong spirits.

So, officially I lost one pound this week. I am happy. I really wanted to hit the 20 pound mark by Christmas and I’m not sure I am going to get there. I really do lose slowly….1 pound is a good week for me.

But, I will continue to plug away. All those “1’s” add up!

Most of my pants are getting too big. I am going to go shopping after Christmas and buy some pants for work.

It was a super busy weekend. I was exhausted on Friday night after my travels to California last week.

Saturday was a total clean the house kind of day. My hubby even cleaned the pantry (really needed it!) We cleaned everything! House looks great. I was joking with some friends yesterday that my house is so clean I could sell it! Ha! Not going to do that, but it is in tip top shape! Love that!

Yesterday I hosted a Silpada party. I love jewelry and Silpada is beautiful. I did pretty good. I am getting about $300 in free jewelry. Yay! It was fun too. Had some of my girlfriends over for the party and hosted lunch. I served a very Weight Watcher friendly menu: Corn Chowder, Spinach Salad, Pumpkin Dip with Gingersnaps, rolls, pumpkin bread.

Most of the Christamas shopping is done. Still need to buy hubby a couple things, he is so hard to buy for. But, the kids are completely done.

Here is hoping for another successful, on program week!

Well, I made it back from California.

Business trips are interesting because there is always so much FOOD everywhere you go. And you don’t have to pay for any of it - it is all FREE!

But, I did really awesome. Not to be tooting my own horn, but I am tooting my own horn! LOL. There were cookies, brownies (really huge fudgy ones), m&m’s, peanuts, and really unlimited really bad for you kinds of foods.

I stayed away from all temptations! Seriously, not one m&m!

I made the best choices I could with every meal. Yay!

We will see what the scale has to say on Monday!

Whew! I am glad last week is over! The challenges to stay on program just keep coming. Friday night I went to my company’s holiday party. Which was a riot! But, I did really good points wise. Drank Cosmos versus Amaretto Sours. I looked up the calorie count for both…it was 130 cals vs 330 cals. Uh, excuse me bartender…I will have a COSMO.

Then Saturday I went to an annual Arts & Craft fair with a bunch of girlfriends. And after we shop we all go to this tavern for lunch. I didn’t drink (Huge Victory) and ordered the Halibut Taco Salad and ate it with salsa. (Yay ME!) My usual fare at this tavern would be fish and chips. Not this year! Ok, but why does the healthy stuff always cost more than the junky food?

All in all, I ended up losing another pound this week!

Now, this week has its challenges too! I am traveling on business to San Jose, California. There will be group dinners, breakfasts, all that good stuff. I am determined to stay on track and make the best decisions possible. Also, I will take advantage of the work out room!

I think that it isn’t so much that the holidays that make it tough to stay on program, but it is the real life events that happen every week…these are continual challenges. I need to face each event with a strategy so I can continue to be on program. I think that just by being aware of what is coming ahead, will help me strategize to stay STRONG!

Yesterday was filled with small victories for me…..

First, I went to lunch yesterday at a local pub for a co-workers birthday. I had only had a one point english muffin for breakfast, so I was prepared. I ordered the Ahi Sandwich with sweet potato fries. I only ate a handful of the fries. It was so good and I estimate around 13 points.

Then there was bunco last night. I had alread decided no alcohol (too many points!). I started out with a bottle of water and no appetizers! Then came dinner. I had one scoop of chinese chicken casserole and salad and one small egg roll. I really wanted more dinner…but I resisted! I still am amazed that I didn’t go back for seconds. That was huge for me.

I totally stayed within my points!

Now, tonight I have our office holiday party. It is open bar! Yikes! And a buffet, with filet minon! Double Yikes!

But, I am up for the challenge….I promise to make good choices!

I’ll let you know how I do!

Happy Friday and have a great weekend.

OK, lately I have found myself thinking about what I will look like in 6 months, or a year from now after I have lost significant weight. To date I have lost 16 pounds and some clothes are already getting too big!

It is hard not to think about wearing a really cute little cocktail dress next year to the hoiday party for work. Or to think about next summer being able to wear this really cute dress that has been hanging in my closet for quite sometime now that I have never had on because it is a size Medium!

I think that having in my mind what I will look like is good, it inspires me to keep on track.

I off handedly told my husband that “when” I lose all this weight I am going to completely clean out my closet and buy all new clothes! His eyes became big as saucers! I had to laugh.

Even now some of my pants are getting baggy and I am thinking that after Christmas when everyone starts marking everything down, I need to buy some pants.

I love dreaming about what it will be like to wear clothes not from the “Women’s” dept.

Oh to dream!

How do I know I am being successful in my weight loss effort? When my pants are too big? (They are getting there!) When the scale reaches the next 10 pound goal? When others start to notice? (This hasn’t happened yet… :O( )

I mean, I feel really good. I have more energy, I feel in control of my eating, I am eating so healthy - I can take great pride in all of these things. I need to keep playing in my head that I am successful everyday I stay on program! Success should not be measured by others comments. We should not measure who we are as people based on what others say about us!

I think I am in the middle of the struggle now. The newness has worn off. I am in the thick of the battle - the “do or die” part. The day to day, this is going to be my life forever part!

Am I ready? Yes, I am.

Am I going to give up? No, not this time!

I am in it to win this battle….once and for all.

Yes, I am.

I lost 1 POUND! The week of Thanksgiving I lost a pound! I am sooooo very happy!

This morning (very early 5:00 a.m.) I weighed on the bathroom scale and I almost fell over! To lose a pound the week of Thanksgiving is truly amazing.

I was good, even if I do say so myself. I totally paced myself and made good choices. When you do those things, you can actually lose weight. I know it all boils down to science, but sometimes it doesn’t feel that logical. But, I cut back my points all week preceding Thanksgiving, and then after the “day” I went back to counting points again.

Here’s to another successful week!

Yay!

But regardless, I am delighted and I am ready for the week ahead (which includes our company holiday party!)

Well, Thanksgiving is tomorrow and I am ready, at least in my mind I am!

My strategy started on Monday. I have been very conservative in what I have eaten so far this week. In fact, I have eaten less points than normal all week. And I have exercised every night. (DDR is getting easier and easier!) That way when it comes to Thursday, I can have what I want. I am not going to go hog wild! But, I will eat something if I want it.

Although, over the course of the past 2 months when I have a big event I plan for I find that I don’t eat a lot. I keep thinking, NWC! Not worth the Calories!

I would love to post a loss on Monday, so I am going to try and make the best decisions possible. But, I will have pumpkin pie!

Here is my list of some of the things I am thankful for:

1. Great Husband
2. Great Kids
3. Great Job
4. Great House
5. Great Northwest (where I live!)
6. Great Life - I have been blessed so many times over and I really am thankful!

Happy Thanksgiving!

I lost another 1.6 pounds this week. For a total of 14 pounds! Yay! I am so happy, and really amazed at how easy it has been. My mind it totally “in the game.”

I was talking to my mom this weekend, and told her about my loss. I honestly believe that at least 50% of the weight loss battle is in my mind. I am very into controlling my diet at this point it really has been effortless.

Trust me, I have dieted so many times I cannot even count. But this time it is different. I am mindful of everything I choose to eat - and the consequences of eating or drinking that item. I am making good choices and it feels great to have control.

I am in control right now.

My little prayer is to stay in control!

Oh, and one small NSV - tried on a pair of pants this a.m. that are too big! Another YAY!

Yay! I made it to Friday again!

This has been a really good week. I was totally on program and did DDR every night! I can tell that I am improving. My “skills” are much more refined.

Next week and I want to start using the Bowflex every other night. I need to come up with a good routine of DDR one night, Bowflex the next. I think it will balance it out well.

I have to take my daughter grocery shopping tomorrow. She is 15 and in July decided to become a vegetarian. This has been an adjusment, but I was totally supportive and we made good progress on her eating. Well, now she had decided to be a VEGAN! Which is great, but really hard to find foods that are in my kitchen! So, we are going to one of the special markets here in Seattle to find more vegan friendly foods. I never knew how many foods have milk and eggs in them! Wish me luck!

Hope everybody has a great weekend!

Did you know that when you eat healthy, get lots of fiber, low fat, and balanced you actually feel really great? Isn’t that amazing?

I have so much more energy! It really does surprise me when I think about it.

I live in Washington State and this time of year it gets dark really early! The sun sets at around 4:30 p.m. And usually I am wanting to go to bed at 9:00 because I am so tired. I think I might have a slight case of SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder). That is a depression from lack of sunlight. (The flip side is that in the summer months it is light until 10:00 p.m. - I love that!) But, I have noticed that so far this year I am not tired at 9:00 p.m. and am not exhibiting any symptoms of SAD. I truly believe it is because of the diet and exercise. How cool is that? I don’t feel like hibernating this year!

Last night I did DDR again for about an hour with DD. It is so much fun and does not feel like exercise. But, you can really get your heart rate going!

I do find that after exercising at night I don’t want my snacks I have planned for the evening. So for the past two days I haven’t eaten all my points. I have been 4 - 5 points short. I don’t think that is a good trend and I need to plan my points better in the day if I continue to not be hungry after exercising.

Hope you all have a great day!

Cheers.

So, last night after dinner I told me 15 yo dd that I wanted to do DDR (DDR = Dance Dance Revolution - game on Playstation 2 where you compete in dancing…loads of fun). She said she wanted to do it too. So we set it up, 2 pads to duel. We danced, intensely, for over an hour. It was great! She was pusing me to try harder songs and harder levels. My husband was shocked when he came back into the room and we were STILL dancing.

Then after we cooled down, she told me it was time to do crunches! We did 3 sets of 70.

It was great!

Cheers.

Yesterday I was walking to the train after work and I ended up behind this really large man. He was probably about 6′8″ tall, but he was probably pushing 400 pounds. My first reaction was “Boy, he’s huge” - then my second reaction was “Boy, he can really move for being so BIG” (he was walking really fast!). Then I was thinking about him and how he would be a great candidate for the Biggest Loser…and then I thought “Why am I thinking this way!” Shouldn’t I just be more concerned about my own weight loss and not judge other people? Why does it matter what size he is?

I judge people based on their size, and I’M FAT!

I find myself judging people all the time, and I want to stop! I mean I compare myself with others all the time - am I bigger than they are? Am I smaller? Why do I base my judgements on SIZE? Does size matter?

I know I am trying to lose weight, and thus become a smaller person. But, my motivation is more than “to wear a size 6″ - it has to do with being healthy, enjoying life, feeling free enough in my own skin to do everything I’m not doing now because I’m overweight. To not be winded when I climb 4 flights of stairs!

This journey is so much more than the food we choose to eat every day.

I think this journey is like an onion. I keep peeling off the layers (both physically and mentally!) Hopefully, one day when I reach my goal my mind and body will be healthy.

Cheers.

I had a really great weekend. Totally caught up on my sleep, cleaned the house (even cleaned the carpets), went shopping (got a killer deal on a new purse!), planned the menu for the week, grocery shopped, and most importantly stayed totally on program all weekend long!

Friday night we went to dinner at our favorite hang out. They have a huge side salad! This thing is dinner plate sized! Since we ordered pizza for dinner, it is great to start out with a big salad. I always order my dressing on the side - and lately I have noticed that I’m really not using much dressing. That way I can really TASTE the veggies. They are quite good! I had a really good time with the family. My dd is 15 and ds is 11. They were really delightful - we laughed a lot!

Saturday after cleaning the house, I went to the mall to look for a new purse. Ended up at Liz Claiborne and they had a lot of purses on sale. I didn’t want to spend that much, due to the holidays just around the corner. Well the purse I found was on sale for $14.79 and I had a 20% coupon…with tax and the discount my total was $13.01. This purse originally was $129.00! SWEET!

Then yesterday my husband called on a Foosball table that was listed in Craiglist for FREE! It is only 3 years old and it is really nice. So we jumped in the van and went and picked it up. It is very nice. My 11 year old son loves it. And it is a great family activity.

Then yesterday afternoon was all about getting ready for the work week. Made new batch of butternut squash fries (yah!)

So, the meals are all planned and I’m ready for another OP week.

Oh, and I lost another pound this week. For a grand total of 12 pounds lost. Wooooo Hoooo!

Cheers.

Today I am feeling very happy for some reason.

I have consistently been on the WW’ers program for 7 weeks. I feel like I have more energy and sleep so much better.

But, maybe I am feeling so good because I am in control of the one area of my life that has been out of control for so long (my eating and weight)? or is it because I am eating healthier? Having 5 servings of fruits and vegetables maybe does make a difference? (All that squash is a GOOD THING ***see earlier post on being addicted to squash)

Or maybe I’m happy because I am wearing a beautiful silk blouse that I haven’t worn in forever - but now can because I can button it closed!?

Whatever the reason is, I am so happy to day and really thankful that my life is sooooooo gooooood.

Cheers.

I have a dd who is 15. She is smart, beautiful and very trim. She weighs about what I weighed when I was her age, about 125 pounds.

I never felt thin. Ever. And probably because my best friends was super tiny. Compared to them I felt huge. But, when I look at pictures of myself at that age, I was thin or just right for my height.

My dd is a vegetarian and very concerned with what she puts in her mouth. Recently she is always looking at labels so see “what is in it!” This makes me proud! I wish that my mom would have taught me to be as concerned with what I was eating.

Maybe with my daughter being so involved in her daily food choices she will not have to endure the decades of being overweight like I have.

Maybe she will break the cycle!

It is all Roni’s fault! I am addicted to Delicata fries! How crazy is that? I don’t think that if someone told me I would say that 2 months ago I would have believed them.

About a month ago I had a meltdown and confronted dh that he needed to do more around the house. We both work full-time and every night I would come home after being gone 11 1/2 hours and be the one responsible for planning and making dinner, prodding the kids to do homework, you know all that home stuff. He said he would make dinner if I would plan a menu. He really is a great guy and a good cook.

So, the first menu included Roni’s Delicata Steak fries. First time we baked them….and he did a great job they were perfect. Well, there were leftovers and I took them to work the next day and even after re-heating in the microwave they were still delish! I was hooked.

Then, on Halloween I made an entire squash just for me! Everyone else was out trick or treating, so why not?

Then yesterday I cut up and baked 4 squash! Yes, you read right! I ate 1/2 of one, and bagged single sized servings for lunches and snacks the rest of the week.

I told you I am addicted to squash!

Cheers.

Thank you, thank you, thank you!  To everyone who had encouraging words to me last week and the week before when I lost zero pounds.  You were all right!  If I hung in there it would come off, and it did.  I knew it would, but it really feels great when it actually does!

I weighed in this a.m. and was down 2 whole pounds!  I have a lost a total of 11 pounds.  I am so excited!  Yay me!

Things I learned this week:

*    Losing weight is hard

*    Losing weight takes TIME

*    Losing weight is totally 100% something I CAN DO!

Thank you again for all your encouragement.  These blogs are really so helpful to me.

Let’s all have a terrific week!

Cheers.

My pants feel a lot looser today. I haven’t had that feeling in a while. I looked at myself in the mirror just a while a go and they are kind of baggy and these particular pants are not supposed to be baggy. Yay!

I also am wearing a top I haven’t had on in a while and I can see that I have lost weight. It has only been (almost, hopefully on Monday WI) 10 pounds, but itsn’t it amazing that I can tell the difference?

I let myself dream of my body 80 pounds from now, and I have a hard time imagining what I will look like or how I will feel.

It makes me excited to think about, because I am so determined to make that dream a reality. I haven’t felt this determined in a very long time. Four years ago I lost close to 50 pounds and everyone told me how great I looked. Yes, I stopped and gained all the weight plus 10 more back.

Not this time! I want to be like Roni, and all you other inspiring ladies who have done it and continue to do it. I know it is tough, I read your blogs and I see that there are days where you mess up. But the key it NOT TO GIVE UP! Get back in track! Take accountability and move on.

Oh and just think of the shopping!

Cheers.

I read on one of the blogs yesterday that a co-worker declared Halloween is the beginning of “eating season” and I believe this to be TRUE!

I totally made it through yesterday with flying colors. I was surrounded by candy, beautiful handmade butter cookies, and other various temptations. My job requires me to order all catering for an office of 260 people. There was a lot of food ordered yesterday. And I order some pretty darned tasty food! And today there is more food - lots of high fat, delicious food.

But, I just say, “No Thank You” and walk away.

Instead I will pass up that gorgeous bagel and eat my yogurt and banana instead. I will walk right by the taco salad bar provided for us at lunch today - I know I could have “some” - but I will be much more satisfied with a boca burger and left over delicata fries and a pear. To refuse that giant peanut butter and chocolate cookie in exchange eat my vita brownie….all these things make me stronger and honestly feel so much better about myself. My resolve is steadfast!

As “eating season” begins, I resolve to make the best choices I can everyday. That way when it all concludes on January 2, 2008 I will have lost 10 or 15 pounds and not gained an ounce. Boy that sounds GREAT!

I’ll drink (H2O, of course) to that!

Cheers.

I loved Halloween as a child. What a great holiday. You dress up, walk around the neighborhood with your friends, knock on doors and they GIVE YOU CANDY! How awesome is that? Of course back in the 70’s when I was a child we didn’t have candy as much as kids do today.

I still love Halloween. I love pumpkin carving, the cute kids that come to the door in their costumes.

My focus today is going to be on all those things. The cute decorations and everything the holiday has to offer - and I am not going to focus on the food part.

My dh bought the candy for tonight all stuff I really don’t care about! Yah!

Every holiday has some connection with food - I need to start dealing with that today!

Cheers.

Well, I weighed in this morning. Again, no loss. Last week I didn’t lose, this week I didn’t lose.

I really am baffled? I am doing great, really. I am on program, measuring my food, counting the points and still no movement on the scale.

This is exactly the place I have been about 12 times before. I start “being good” I am on track with the program, I lose about 10 pounds then NOTHING! I stall. After 2 or 3 weeks of losing 0 pounds I give up.

Well, I’m not going to this time. I’ll be damned if a little discouragement makes me throw in the towel. I am committed to losing this weight.

So, I’m hanging tough! I’ll keep measuring, pointing, planning.

I’m gonna make that scale move!

Cheers.

Whew! I made it to Friday!

This has been a good week though. I have been OP all week. I had a really good day yesterday. My team at work had a lunch meeting and we ordered box lunches and I ordered a Cobb salad. I had a plan not to eat the avocado or bacon. I totally did a great job and promptly removed these two items from my salad and probably used a tsp. of dressing on the entire salad. I was very proud of myself. The lunch also included a delicious looking piece of marble pound cake and Tim’s Cascade Potato Chips (which I dearly LOVE)….I removed these two items from by box and gave them to my co-workers. I did eat the apple. This was a huge victory for me.

Last night I played DDR with my daughter. I haven’t played in a while and it was really fun. I was totally sweating and having a great time. I need to do that more. How great is it to exercise, have fun and spend time with my 15 year old daughter?

Tonight is girl’s night out….BUNCO. Tonight we have a salad/appetizer theme. I plan on using some extra points and indulging in a couple glasses of sangria - but in the past my weight loss was helped by the one night a week indulgence. I’m looking forward to spending the evening with the girls.

I’m still hoping to make it to my 10 pound weight loss goal on Monday!

Hmm, maybe a few more sessions of DDR will help……

Cheers.

Have you ever had a love affair? I mean a deep down burning affair? The kind that consumes your every thought? You think about it all the time, obsessive love affair?

I am in love. I love food. I mean I really, really love it. I love to think about it, read about it, plan it, shop for it, cook it.